Family Guy (TV Series)
Bango Was His Name Oh! (2006)
Mila Kunis: Meg Griffin
Quotes
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Meg Griffin : [Peter uses the new TiVo] Dad, what are you doing?
Peter Griffin : Oh, I'm fast-forwarding through these pesky TV shows so I can get to the commercials.
Wilford Brimley : Hi, I'm Wilford Brimley, and I have diabetes. It hurts me to pee and it causes me to be short with my family. I can't sleep at night. The other day, I stubbed my toe and took it out on the dog. And two weeks ago, I ran out of vanilla ice cream and struck my wife. And then I find out my wife's been dead for six years. Who the hell did I hit?
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Meg Griffin : [catching Peter and Lois in the middle of a romantic tryst] Oh, my God!
Chris Griffin : I don't know what they're fighting about, but I think Dad's winning. Go, Dad!
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Peter Griffin : Kids, your mother and I have decided that we're gonna help you two get out in the dating world.
Lois Griffin : That's right. Chris, I'm gonna show you how to be an affable, desirable young man who doesn't smell like the inside of a wool hat.
Chris Griffin : Why you gotta break balls?
Peter Griffin : And, Meg, when I get through with you, you're gonna be beating guys off with both hands.
Meg Griffin : This is gonna be so fun.
Peter Griffin : Hey! Zip it. Rule number one: no speaky until the man speaky to you.
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Peter Griffin : Okay, Meg, lesson one for attracting a man: I want you to shave my back.
Meg Griffin : Ew! Why would I want to do that?
Peter Griffin : Trust me, Meg. Shave a man's back for him and he'll purr like a walrus.
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Meg Griffin : [in the car with Peter] Dad, why are we just sitting here?
Peter Griffin : Just give me a minute, Meg.
Meg Griffin : What am I supposed to be learning about dating from...
[he sighs in satisfaction]
Meg Griffin : Oh, my, God, Dad, you farted! That is so nasty!
Peter Griffin : [she tries to get out] No, no, no, Meg. Meg, this is crucial, all right? The sexiest thing a woman can do for a man is learn to love his gas. Love the gas, Meg. Love it!
[he accidentally farts again, and she tries to get out]
Peter Griffin : No, no, no, Meg, no, no. This is why we're here. This is why we're here. This is why we're here.