Memorable quotes for
Forgetting Sarah Marshall (2008)

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[from trailer]
Matthew: I have a question for you real quick. What did you think of my demo? Did you get it?
Aldous Snow: I was gonna listen to that, but then, um, I just carried on living my life.

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Brian: You don't need to put your P in a V right now.
Peter Bretter: No, I need to B my L on someone's T's.

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Surfing Instructor: Come on out. Oh, the weather outside is weather...

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Surfing Instructor: When life gives you lemons, just say 'Fuck the lemons,' and bail.

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Matthew: Oh ok, I'll just go fuck myself then.

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Darald: God put our mouths on our head for a reason. No!

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Peter Bretter: Maybe this is a sign from God that I should forget her.
Darald: Maybe this is a sign that you should be *with* her. I love her show. When they mix the sexuality and the violence, I like it.

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Surfing Instructor: You sound like you're from London!

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Surfing Instructor: I like her red hair. I wonder if the carpet matches her pubes.

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Peter Bretter: You shall not pass!

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Kemo: Are those sad tissues or happy tissues?

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Matthew: I just went from six to midnight.

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Model: [very unenthusiastically, while having sex with Peter] Uh. Uh. Uh. Uh. I just came. Uh. Uh. Uh.

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Surfing Instructor: If you get bitten by a shark, you're not just gonna give up surfing, are you?
Peter Bretter: ...yeah, probably

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Surfing Instructor: There's only one cure for pain like that.
Peter Bretter: What?
Surfing Instructor: Weed. Ya got any?
Peter Bretter: No.
Surfing Instructor: Well then let's just go surfing!

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Sarah Marshall: Remember how we thought the killer masturbated before commiting his crimes?
Detective Hunter Rush: Yes?
Sarah Marshall: Take a look...
Detective Hunter Rush: ...Looks like where he's going he'll need to know how to masturbate.

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Peter Bretter: [flexing flabby pecs in mirror] Good for you Peter, good for you.

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Peter Bretter: I wanna stand up before I leave.
Surfing Instructor: I don't think you're ready, man.
Peter Bretter: I'm ready to ride fucking giants, Kunu.
Surfing Instructor: I think you're ready.

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Surfing Instructor: Aloha, man. My name's Kunu.
Peter Bretter: I know, we met duing the surf lesson!
Surfing Instructor: Oh right, you're that guy who works for Kaiser Permanente!
Peter Bretter: No, I'm Peter! We had a really nice talk out on the water!
Surfing Instructor: Oh.
[pause]
Surfing Instructor: Coooool.

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Surfing Instructor: I once saw him beat a guy up with a starfish!
Peter Bretter: That's ridiculous.
Surfing Instructor: That guy was me.

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Peter Bretter: Oh, if they were Sean Jean sweatpants it would be no problem, but because they were Costco brand, it's the worst thing I could do.

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Sarah Marshall: Seemingly, the only actresses that can survive are the ones that show their cooter and I refuse to that. Excuse me, but I have a little dignity.

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Peter Bretter: How are things going with the lady?
Darald: Not awesome. She's complicated, like the Da Vinci Code, except harder to crack.

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Darald: What's the state fish of Hawaii?
Dwayne the Bartender: The Humuhumunukunukuapua'a. Yeah, bitch!

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Sarah Marshall: I need you to get hard, Pete.
Peter Bretter: I know what I'm supposed to do.

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Sarah Marshall: [lifts up the sheet] What do you think, Rush?
Detective Hunter Rush: [cringes] It's going to be hard for her to reenter the pageant... without a face.

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Darald: You have Christ between your thighs... only with a shorter beard.

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Dwayne the Bartender: Snuffleupagous fucks my shit up!

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Dwayne the Bartender: Why won't anybody go snorkeling with me?

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Aldous Snow: [after spilling red wine on his shirt] Oh God, please take my eyes, but not the shirt!

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Dwayne the Bartender: He turned down a blow job from his ex-girlfriend... mid-blowjob. You know how hard that is for a man? It's called blue balls. He's like Gandhi! But better - he likes puppets!

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Aldous Snow: Look at my limo driver... I'm going to have sex with her! alright!

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Darald: Let me just say that if God was a city planner he would not put a playground next to a sewage system!

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Peter Bretter: You're like one of those women from Flavor of Love. 'I'm gonna kill you'

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Darald: Off to find the mythical clitoris!

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Gag Me Girl: Hi.
Peter Bretter: Hi.
Gag Me Girl: Hi.
Peter Bretter: Hi.
Gag Me Girl: Hi.
Peter Bretter: Can you stop doing that?
Gag Me Girl: Do you want to gag me?
Peter Bretter: You brought a gag?
Gag Me Girl: Yeah, and handcuffs. So do you wanna gag me?
Peter Bretter: Well, I kinda want to now.

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Aldous Snow: I mean, I've heard that women do fake orgasms, but I've never seen it... It really, deeply upset me.

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Aldous Snow: Yeah, I had a girl cheat on me once, with both Liam Gallagher and Noel Gallagher.

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Sarah Marshall: Do you want to put some clothes on!
Peter Bretter: Oh, would you like to pick out the outfit that you break up with me in!

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Surfing Instructor: I'm going to give you a Hawaiian name...Peepyopee!

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