Doctor Who (TV Series)

The Feast of Steven (1965)

William Hartnell: Dr. Who

Quotes 

• [last lines] 

  Dr. Who : [to the viewing audience]  And incidentally, a happy Christmas, to all of you at home!

• Dr. Who : Well, I suppose you might say that I am a citizen of the universe and a gentleman to boot!

• First Policeman : [the Doctor pokes his head out of the TARDIS door]  Good evening.

  Dr. Who : Good evening.

  First Policeman : Hey, you!

  [the Doctor ducks back into the TARDIS and closes the door] 

  Second Policeman : What's up?

  First Policeman : [to the Second Policeman]  See that?

  Second Policeman : See what?

  First Policeman : [pointing at the TARDIS]  That then!

  Second Policeman : What when?

  First Policeman : That door!

  Second Policeman : That door?

  First Policeman : It opened!

  Second Policeman : Did it?

  First Policeman : There's a bloke in there.

  Second Policeman : Oh, Aye.

  First Policeman : A bloke with

  [stutters] 

  First Policeman : long white hair. I just saw him.

  Second Policeman : Did ya?

  First Policeman : Aye.

  Second Policeman : It's locked.

  First Policeman : But, I just saw him!

  Second Policeman : Oh, aye.

• Dr. Who : I don't think you really understand. That object in the yard out there isn't really a police box.

  Detective-Inspector : No. No, of course it's not. It's a new Brighton Ferry.

  Dr. Who : It is a machine for investigating Time and Relative Dimensions in Space. Hmm, hmm.

  Second Policeman : [to the Detective-Inspector]  He's a nutter.

  Detective-Inspector : He's straight from a funny-farm, if you ask me.

  Dr. Who : Do I take it that you gentlemen are imputing that I am mentally deranged, hmm, hmm? Hmm.

  Second Policeman : I told you. He's a nutter.

  Detective-Inspector : Was he the only bloke in the box?

  First Policeman : Well, how should I know?

  Detective-Inspector : Well didn't you check? There might be a whole army of

  [stutters] 

  Detective-Inspector : them in there, living like gypsies in one of Her Majesty's police telephone boxes!

  Second Policeman : And just how many people do you expect to come out of one box?

• [first lines] 

  Sara : Something's gone wrong.

  Dr. Who : What's the matter, my dear, hm?

  Sara : It's stopped going up and down.

  Steven : That's alright, it means we've landed.

  Dr. Who : Tut, tut, tut. Dear, dear, dear, dear, dear, yes that scanner's not working.

  Sara : Can you mend it?

  Dr. Who : Yes I can repair it, of course, which means checking the whole circuit.

  Steven : Right let's get started.

  Dr. Who : Ah, ah, ah. Don't you dare touch anything.

  Steven : Why not?

  Dr. Who : Well, just look at those dials my dear boy! Sara. look at those dials, now you know what that means? If either of you went outside, it would be extremely dangerous. The whole atmosphere is poisonous.

• Steven : And just why, if it isn't safe for us, is it safe for you?

  Dr. Who : Will neither of you understand?

  Sara : For heaven's sake, let's go and fix the scanner!

  Dr. Who : No! Where you come from, in both places, the air is pure. Outside there is the worst kind of pollution I've met in years!

  Steven : Right. Then you shouldn't go out there, either.

  Dr. Who : Ah, my dear boy, I'm used to all sorts of atmospheres. Won't affect me. I shall have to go out and do the repairing myself.

  Sara : But suppose something happens to you?

  Dr. Who : Then, and only then, can you come out. But you must be very, very careful...

  Steven : And how are we supposed to know that something has happened to you?

  Dr. Who : My dear young man, just give me a few minutes and, if all is well, I shall be back inside again to tell you.

  Steven : And if not, we come out and find you? I seem to have been through all this before!

  Dr. Who : Now, look here my boy. You will do as you're told! Now you just open the doors and remember to close them after I've gone.

  Steven : Yes, sir!