Dinosaurs (TV Series)

The Mighty Megalosaurus (1991)

Stuart Pankin: Earl Sinclair

Quotes 

• Howard Handupme : A meteor, twice the size of earth, is heading towards our planet and will destroy all life.

  [a piece of paper is slid across the desk by an assistant] 

  Howard Handupme : This just in: no, it's not.

  Earl Sinclair : Oh, good.

  [changes the channel from the news and finds a wrestling match, which is depicted as two live action dinosaurs fighting in an old black and white movie] 

  Earl Sinclair : Oh, wrestling.

  [chuckles as he settles in] 

• Earl Sinclair : I am the mighty Megalosaurus, the king of the dinosaurs. And when the king of the dinosaurs wants a 90-inch television set, he's going to get a 90-inch television set. So what do you have to say about that?

  Fran Sinclair : The Tyrannosaurus is king of the dinosaurs.

  Earl Sinclair : That's debatable.

  Fran Sinclair : No it isn't. I dated one in high school.

• Earl Sinclair : [the Baby's reaching for the remote as Earl watches a wrestling match]  Don't you touch that remote control.

  [Baby puts a single finger on the TV remote] 

  Earl Sinclair : Don't you pick that up.

  [Baby picks it up] 

  Earl Sinclair : You turn off that television, you're gonna be one sorry little dinosaur.

  Baby : [turns off TV and pops up]  I'm sorry!

  Earl Sinclair : Gimme that back.

  Baby : Story.

  Earl Sinclair : No story.

  Baby : Story.

  Earl Sinclair : No story.

  Baby : Story!

  Earl Sinclair : No story, gimme that back.

  [Baby hits Earl in the face with the remote] 

  Earl Sinclair : [trying to scare Baby]  Once upon a time, dinosaurs didn't have families. They lived in the woods, and ate their children, and it was a golden age.

• Earl Sinclair : School is not for asking questions, it's a place you go to be out of this house.

• Earl Sinclair : I'm 43 years old and I've never been to Europe.

• Baby : Then what happened?

  Earl : I went to work.

  Baby : Why?

  Earl : Because your mother makes me.

  Baby : Am I at work?

  Earl : No.

  Baby : Am I at work?

  Earl : No.

  Baby : Am I at work?

  Earl : Yes, yes.

  Baby : No, I'm not.

• Earl Sinclair : Fran, I'm home, I'm hungry. I'm stuck in the door again.

• Earl Sinclair : There's no dinner, there's no vegetables.

  Fran Sinclair : Dinner ate the vegetables.

  Earl Sinclair : And left just like that? Without coffee? Well, he's never eating around here again.

• Earl Sinclair : And your apology would begin how?

  Fran Sinclair : Pots and pans, to cook your dinner in, dinner for YOU, gee I don't know WHERE my apology should begin.

• Charlene Sinclair : Daddy, can't I even say hello without you thinking that I want something?

  [Earl looks at her] 

  Charlene Sinclair : A sweater. I just want a sweater.

  Earl : I just want dinner but it doesn't look good for either of us.

• Fran : [repeated lines when Earl is in trouble]  Earl Snead Sinclair!

  Earl : Oh, God, my whole name.

• Baby : [upon hearing the start to Earl's story, rather than being scared, he laughs]  Then what?

  Earl Sinclair : Well, then one day, not very long ago, daddy dinosaurs and mommy dinosaurs started getting married and living in houses and raising children.

  Baby : And lived happily ever after.

  Earl Sinclair : Well, that was the idea.

  Baby : What happened?

  Earl Sinclair : Well, some dinosaurs wondered if they were doing the right thing.

  Baby : [interrupting]  I want to be in the story!

  Earl Sinclair : [reassuring]  You are.

  Baby : Oh.

  Earl Sinclair : But it starts just before you were born. Your mother was cooking dinner as usual, and dinner was trying to escape, as usual.