- Auction Woman: Isn't she just perfect?
- Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: It certainly is. I remember the day it was painted. This little masterpiece means a whole world to me. The truth is, it gave me a whole new understanding of art.
- Auction Woman: Did you say you were there when he painted it?
- Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Yes, I was.
- Auction Woman: [sighs] That's really neat.
- Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: See the date?
- Auction Woman: Yeah.
- Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: 1908. I was on a world lecture tour with mom and dad. My tutor Helen Seymour was in charge of me in Paris. That's what I let her think, anyway
- [the woman laughs]
- Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Back home Taft was elected president, and Jack Johnson was the first black boxing heavyweight champion. It was the beginning of a new century. The modern age was upon us. Paris was the city of art. And Miss Seymour was determined that I would see all of it.
- Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I'm not sure if Picasso ever knew, but Degas was almost blind at the time. But Degas was a sly old fox, and I think he knew what was going on. So in the end, the joke was on Picasso.
- Pablo Picasso: [referring to Degas] Once he was the master. Now his mind has grown old, stale and closed. I can paint him into the ground!
- Pablo Picasso: Now for the final stage.
- [throws away the canvas and puts a fresh one on the easle]
- Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Final stage?
- Pablo Picasso: To get Degas right, you must do it as he does: from memory.
- Police Inspector: [having claimed to speak perfect English] We will not pour water on top of oil. I promise you, I am an expert kidnapper of small children.
- Pablo Picasso: [addressing two ladies of the street] Come with us!
- Prostitute: Non, non, we are working.
- Pablo Picasso: But you must eat! Come, it will be fun!
- Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: When did you decide to become a painter?
- Pablo Picasso: Most men, they have a choice. Become a banker, a lawyer, a tailor, a mechanic. Me, I have no choice. No true artist has choice. I must create in order to feel alive.
- Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: But when you paint a wild horse, what does it look like?
- Pablo Picasso: You might not see the horse, but you will certainly see the wildness.
- Miss Seymour: You will not leave this room until you finish 'Les Miserables'.
- Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Great title...
- Pablo Picasso: Don't move!
- [aims his pistol at Miss Seymour]
- Miss Seymour: You can't frighten me.
- Pablo Picasso: If you don't keep quiet, the drawing will frighten both of us.
- Miss Seymour: [Picasso has drawn a portrait of Miss Seymour] Good Lord.
- Pablo Picasso: It is not a religious drawing.
- Miss Seymour: No, I know, but you really can draw.
- Pablo Picasso: Better than anyone alive.
- Miss Seymour: Don't boast.
- Pablo Picasso: Why not, it's true.