- [the FBI have arrested a member of a group which has been bombing black churches in Tennessee]
- President Josiah Bartlet: How'd you get him?
- FBI Special Agent Michael Casper: He was pulled over for a bad brake light and he thought it was something else.
- President Josiah Bartlet: Two-year investigation gets its first crack from a broken taillight.
- FBI Special Agent Michael Casper: In thirteen years with the Bureau, I've discovered that there's no amount of money, manpower or knowledge that can equal the person you're looking for being stupid.
- President Josiah Bartlet: God, well... Some of the stupidest criminals in the world are working right here in America. I've always been very proud of that.
- Atty. Jordon Kendall: I don't understand how you could have a drink. I don't understand how after everything you worked for - how, on that day of all days, you could be so stupid.
- Leo McGarry: That's because you think it has something to do with smart and stupid. Do you have any idea how many alcoholics are in Mensa? You think it's a lack of willpower? That's like thinking somebody with anorexia nervosa has an overdeveloped sense of vanity...
- Leo McGarry: Don't help me.
- Josh Lyman: I'm going to help you, 'cause you know why?
- Leo McGarry: 'Cause you walk around with so much guilt about everybody you love dying that you're a compulsive fixer?
- Josh Lyman: No, Leo, no. It's 'cause a guy is walking down the street and he falls into a hole, see.
- Leo McGarry: Yeah.
- Josh Lyman: Yeah.
- Sen. Maj. Counsel Cliff Calley: That's where you're going with this?
- [surprise line of questioning]
- Rep. Darren Gibson, R-MI: Yeah.
- Sen. Maj. Counsel Cliff Calley: Just to embarrass the guy.
- Rep. Darren Gibson, R-MI: Just?
- Sen. Maj. Counsel Cliff Calley: Leo McGarry's sobriety isn't the subject of these hearings. These hearings are to investigate if any rules, ethical or otherwise, were broken by Jed Bartlet while he was running for President.
- Rep. Darren Gibson, R-MI: That's nice, but I live in the actual world, where the object of these hearings is to win.
- Sen. Maj. Counsel Cliff Calley: No, it's not.
- Rep. Darren Gibson, R-MI: It's the object of the majority.
- Sen. Maj. Counsel Cliff Calley: Not while I'm the majority counsel it's not; this is bush league. This is why good people hate us, this, right here, this thing... And if you proceed with this line of questioning, I will resign this committee and wait in the tall grass for you Congressman, because you are killing the party.
- Atty. Jordon Kendall: You had a drink?
- Leo McGarry: I'm an alcoholic, I don't have one drink. I don't understand people who have one drink. I don't understand people who leave half a glass of wine on the table. I don't understand people who say they've had enough. How can you have enough of feeling like this? How can you not want to feel like this longer? My brain works differently.
- Abbie Bartlet: Sam Seaborn's very funny.
- President Josiah Bartlet: Which one's he?
- Abbie Bartlet: The young one.
- President Josiah Bartlet: They're all young.
- FBI Special Agent Michael Casper: Listen, churches are burning down. Otherwise, I'd be hitting on you.