The Sopranos (TV Series)
Whitecaps (2002)
James Gandolfini: Tony Soprano
Photos
Quotes
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Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : You know, when you asked me what Irina's cousin had, that you don't have? Well, I thought about it, 'cause it's a pretty good fucking question. And yes, she's sexy enough even with the one pin gone, but that's not it. I could converse with her 'cause she had something to say.
Carmela Soprano : I AM HERE! I have things to say!
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : Besides bringing the fuckin' chairs down and sign the fucking trust! She was a grown fuckin' woman who was kicked around. And she's been on her own and she had to fight and struggle!
Carmela Soprano : Unlike me? Is that it?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : Yeah.
Carmela Soprano : [shouting] Who the fuck wanted it like this? Who the fuck pissed and moaned of just the idea of me with a fucking real estate license?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : Well, you sit back for 20 fucking years all you did was fiddle with the air conditioning and fucking bitch and complain! And fucking bitch, bitch, bitch to me! TO YOUR PRIEST! FUCK IT!
Carmela Soprano : Who knew all this time you wanted Tracy and Hepburn? Well Tony, what about all the thousand other fucking pigs you had your dick in over the years? The strippers, the cocktail waitresses, were they all your best friends all of them too?
[pause]
Carmela Soprano : You fucking hypocrite.
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Carmela Soprano : Just for the record, I would have gone on with your cheating, and your bullshit, if your attitude around here had been the least bit loving, concerned, interested.
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : Whose idea was Whitecaps?
Carmela Soprano : That's just a bigger version of an emerald ring. So you can go on with your other life.
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : You don't know me at all.
Carmela Soprano : I know you better than anybody, Tony, even your friends. Which is probably why you hate me?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : Hate you? I don't hate you, but hey, I'm going to hell when I die. Nice thing to say to a guy headed into an MRI.
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Carmela Soprano : You have made a fool of me for years with these whores. Now it's come into our home?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : What are you talking about?
Carmela Soprano : The RUSSIAN called. Your son answered the telephone!
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : Oh, Jesus. Carmela, she's insane. She's certifiable, I told you. You can't believe a word she says, whatever it is, and we haven't seen each other like that, I swear to Christ!
Carmela Soprano : What about her cousin?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : [realizing he's been caught] What? No.
Carmela Soprano : The nurse who took care of your mother, who I liked? Who I spoke to on the phone about your mother's alopecia and her bowel movements? Who I shared vodka with the night your mother died? You've been FUCKING her?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : There is not a shred of truth in that.
Carmela Soprano : Why would the cousin make it up, huh? Because she's jealous?
[she lunges at him and he grabs her and pins her to the wall]
Carmela Soprano : LET GO OF ME!
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[Christopher just got out of drug rehab]
Tony Soprano : So, what step are you at now?
Christopher Moltisanti : I did all the steps, except for the one where I'm supposed to go around and apologize to all the people I fucked over when I was using.
Tony Soprano : ...I think maybe you shouldn't do that one. You know, let sleeping dogs lie.
Christopher Moltisanti : Yeah, that's what I was thinking.
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Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : Carmela, who the fuck did you think I was when you married me, huh? You knew my father, you grew up around Dicky Moltisanti and your uncle Eddie. Where do you get off acting so surprised and miffed when there are women on the side? You knew the deal.
Carmela Soprano : Deal?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : And your mother can talk about what she wants about whats his name and his chain of drug stores. You and I both know that the other boyfriend you were debating marrying was Gerry Tuffie and his father's snow plow buisness. And we now know that that wouldn't of suited you at all.
Carmela Soprano : You really don't hear me, do you? You think for me it's all about things.
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : No I forced all this shit on you. What you really crave is a Hyundai and a simple gold heart on a chain.
Carmela Soprano : You are so fucking hateful.
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Carmine Lupertazzi : [Referring to Tony and Carmella separating] I'm sorry to learn about the marital situation. Our "thing" is more than a livelihood. One of us suffers a personal tragedy, falls ill what not, and we all feel it deeply no matter what kind of acrimony is in the air
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : What's "in the air" is that your losing money out your ass
Carmine Lupertazzi : We all agree we want to get back to earning but I reiterate again Zellman had a hand in HUD so I can't as a matter of principle: I can't relinquish my claim.
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : So?
Carmine Lupertazzi : I said forty, you said five and a half, which was ridiculous. Let's split the difference: twenty percent
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : Fifteen
Carmine Lupertazzi : You know what? In the interest of putting this shit to bed, fifteen
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : Good
Carmine Lupertazzi : My son was a big help with this I want you to always remember that even when after I'm gone but I'm not going no place
Johnny 'Sack' Sacrimoni : Healthy as a fuckin rhino this guy
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : You stay that way
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Svetlana Kirilenka : [Referring to Irina] she's not there, she probably is hiding in Brighton Beach. She blames you for Ronnie Zellman: you beat him with a belt, he felt weak in front of her, and couldn't perform. They broke up not so long after
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : Oh, fuck that. Who told her about us? Not you please, it was the one who fuckin walked in on us
Svetlana Kirilenka : Branka we had bad fight over FICA and Federal withholding I took from her paycheck
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : Jesus fuckin Christ, FICA and Federal with holding? I've got to go home tomorrow and tell my kids we're separated. It's going to rip them up
Svetlana Kirilenka : Divorce is very hard for kids after this they don't trust you. I'm a child of a divorce
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : She shouldn't have been drinking in the afternoon. How about a little sympathy? What'd you got ice in your veins?
Svetlana Kirilenka : I had ice in my veins on your uncle's couch
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : The most expensive piece of ass I ever had
Svetlana Kirilenka : Right, I know what your thinking too
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Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : [Meeting in an Office Max] where's Carmine at?
Johnny 'Sack' Sacrimoni : [Referring to the terms of the proposal] No change what so ever
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : where you at?
Johnny 'Sack' Sacrimoni : I think a movement from below is not palpable for the other bosses. It's what they do most. A movement from outside is more forgivable and more understandable: given the facts here. I mean you've been reasonable
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : If I do it, what'd you do for me?
Johnny 'Sack' Sacrimoni : I take a "say it so" and make it better with the other families as regards to you. It's smart to have reservations but there's differences between this and Castellano. Yes you still got four other families that could raise a stink but Andy's my brother in law. I have their ear
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : I'm going to pass
Johnny 'Sack' Sacrimoni : The fuck you talking about?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : I'm taking all the risk
Johnny 'Sack' Sacrimoni : The fuck you were talking about last time? What would it take?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : Fuck even one percentage point. All claims to my HUD business are irrigated
Johnny 'Sack' Sacrimoni : Alright
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : [Before hugging] all future construction projects: sixty forty in my favor
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Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : What I'm going to tell you is for your ear's only, and Sil's. We're going to take out Carmine Lupertazzi
Christopher Moltisanti : Johnny Sack's going to war Tone
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : [Implying Johnny's in on the hit] no, his not. That's right. See Carmine's got major income besides construction. Johnny don't. The only other person hurting more than any of these pricks is me
Christopher Moltisanti : Whacking a boss of one of the five families, Johnny's a snaky fuck
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : Well, that's something to be considered. Remember how also deeply hurt fuckin Johnny felt over Carmine not backing him on those slurs against Ginny?
Christopher Moltisanti : Life's funny
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : Carmine never made that right with John. I knew back then it was a mistake
Christopher Moltisanti : Are we going to hit Carmine soon?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : If I'm going to buy this house I'm going to need the Esplanade "scratch." It shouldn't look like what it is: home invasion, carjacking, fuckin ingrown toenail
Christopher Moltisanti : I know these black guys from Irvington
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : That's the right idea. It could never get out who whacked the old fuck. Are they trustworthy these guys?
Christopher Moltisanti : Yeah
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : Make sure
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Christopher Moltisanti : [Sarcastically to Adriana] thanks by the way for drinking wine in front of me
Christopher Moltisanti : [Answering his cell phone] Hello?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : [Referring to the hit on Carmine Lupertazzi] Call it off, the old guy
Christopher Moltisanti : Yeah?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : Something don't make sense here
Christopher Moltisanti : You think it's a setup?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : Not necessarily but our "friend" up there is very anxious to "pass the ball" to the prick. But nobody could ever know this was considered
Christopher Moltisanti : I'll offer my guys half of what they would've got: that should do it
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : I just want you to make sure I told you that
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Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : [Meeting privately] You been waiting long? Sorry I was interviewing divorce lawyers
Johnny 'Sack' Sacrimoni : That's what I always ask myself: "Is it worth it financially?"
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : You and Ginny are the old married couple
Johnny 'Sack' Sacrimoni : Marriage can be very hard work if both aren't pulling their loads. I was wondering, why the delay?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : I was going to call you, you're not going to be happy: I'm out. Whacking a boss is bad for business, now that he settled...
Johnny 'Sack' Sacrimoni : We can weather it
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : It's not the internal upheaval. Mr. and Mrs. John Q America by in large they sit still for our shit so people get ripped off. They figure it's not them but it's the O.K. Corral out there, and the Feds take heat
Johnny 'Sack' Sacrimoni : This is very disappointing
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : I know but his an old man come on, your going to get your chance soon enough
Johnny 'Sack' Sacrimoni : Don't go into coaching, it's not your "long suit"
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : What I was going to say...
Johnny 'Sack' Sacrimoni : [Unintentionally misquoting Shakespeare's Macbeth, implying his job is hard enough working for Carmine Lupertazzi Sr., but will even be more difficult working with Carmine Lupertazzi Jr] Tomorrow I go into work. "Creeps on this petty pace." Do I take orders from him again? You know that disgusting fucking cock sucking idiot son of his?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : I shouldn't be hearing that. What I was going to say it's a major step but if you want to do it without me as a partner, you do what you do what you gotta do. I will never ever reveal any conversation we had
Johnny 'Sack' Sacrimoni : The thing is we had those conversations. Your mouth was moving along with mine. So we just go back to our business at the Esplanade like it never happened?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : Yeah that would be the healthy choice
Johnny 'Sack' Sacrimoni : Healthy for who? Why the fuck would I ever trust somebody who would leave me holding my cock like this?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : I shouldn't have heard that either
Johnny 'Sack' Sacrimoni : Well, there you go. There's the fuckin problem
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : I still consider you a dear, dear friend
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Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : get any sleep?
Carmela Soprano : couldn't
Carmela Soprano : [referring to the house they intend to buy on the Jersey Shore] we have absolutely no business getting into something like that house with AJ two years away from college
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : [referring to the person he was just talking to over the phone] that was Virginia Lupo: she hasn't heard from the owner, I guess that deal's not gonna go through?
Carmela Soprano : I wonder who they are?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : [angrily, after opening the Chinese takeout container] mother fuckin God damn orange peel beef!
Carmela Soprano : well, call them up, you got me the plain soup, right?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : we'll be finished eating the rest of this shit by the time he gets back
Carmela Soprano : you have to go through the order while their still here
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : what "good" does that do? They still gotta get it and come back again
Anthony 'A.J.' Soprano, Jr. : [while entering the kitchen] what happened?
Carmela Soprano : they left out part of the order
Anthony 'A.J.' Soprano, Jr. : call them up
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : just sit down and eat
Carmela Soprano : some things aren't meant to be
Anthony 'A.J.' Soprano, Jr. : what're we talking about?
Carmela Soprano : I was thinking about buying your mother a house down the shore
Anthony 'A.J.' Soprano, Jr. : un-fuckin believable
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. , Carmela Soprano : [chastising him for cursing] hey!
Anthony 'A.J.' Soprano, Jr. : would we have a gym?
Carmela Soprano : it's the shore, wouldn't you want to be outdoors?
Carmela Soprano : [to AJ] forget that, your fined three dollars for the "F-word"
Anthony 'A.J.' Soprano, Jr. : I heard dad say "mother F" when I was coming down the stairs
Carmela Soprano : his fined too, we're gonna make this policy work
Anthony 'A.J.' Soprano, Jr. : it's too late
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Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : [while they lay in bed, after she turns on the light in the middle of the night] What's going on?
Carmela Soprano : [referring to the house they intend to buy on the Jersey Shore] It does seem like a good value, even at that price: waterfront property, in that area, we probably wouldn't hurt as an investment?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : You're the one who took real estate classes, didn't you say that a person should look at a house as an investment?
Carmela Soprano : I know you, if you don't get the place, you'll sulk, and I'll be the wet blanket
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : Sulk? I was sleeping
Carmela Soprano : If you want me to sign off, we probably wouldn't lose money but if you wanna go through with it, believe me, that's fine too
Carmela Soprano : [after she turns off the lights] If you did, Virginia Lupo's phone number is on the bureau, better to act quickly, you know more is lost by indecision rather than wrong decision is all I'm saying
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Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : So, how the fuck are you?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : [referring to the rehab clinic] That place help you?
Christopher Moltisanti : Oh, yeah, I found out strengths I have I didn't even know I had
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : Well, you look fuckin great
Christopher Moltisanti : [Referring to his heroin addiction] thank you, thank everybody for forcing me to deal with it... especially Adriana
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : So, you're not shooting junk, right?
Christopher Moltisanti : Fuck no, I'm completely clean and sober
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Alan Sapinsly : [after introducing each other and shaking hands, referring to the house his selling] so, what'd you think?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : [referring to their real estate agent Virginia Lupo] she says three other people will go through with it. I was gonna talk to you "frankly" after I took another look at the place
Alan Sapinsly : the whole thing is so galling, I don't think their gonna qualify for financing, we gave them this God awful ninety-day escrow
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : I can do fifteen days: shortest allowable by law
Alan Sapinsly : [after thinking it over] you'll be coming in with cash, right?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : yeah
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Carmela Soprano : [angered after Irina called Carmela to tell her that Tony slept with her cousin Svetlana] just get out: don't even say anything
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : I'm not going anywhere and you know it. So, let's just lie down, we'll calm down...
Carmela Soprano : [slaps his hand off her shoulder, shouting] get your hand off of me, don't you touch me ever again
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : [changing the subject] where's AJ?
Carmela Soprano : [ignores his question, referring to Svetlana and his other extramarital affairs] so, you got a one legged one now, huh? That's nice, you've had quite a time on my watch, a pre-school assistant, the weight lifter...
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : at least I never stole from you
Carmela Soprano : who stole, me?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : [referring to the money he hid from the authorities] my own wife, forty grand from the bird feeder
Carmela Soprano : bird feeder, listen to yourself, you sound demented
Carmela Soprano : [when he moves closer to her] you want to hit me? Go ahead. Just please go away, I can't stand it anymore
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : I didn't do it
Carmela Soprano : [shouts, referring to Valentina La Paz, one of his previous mistresses] I found her fingernail: you saw it that day, on your night table. I found it and I put it there, I know you saw it
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : [shouts] that...
Carmela Soprano : that what?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : [realizes his been caught] nothing
Carmela Soprano : you know what I don't understand? What does she have that I don't have?
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : [ignores her question] I did not carry on an affair with the cousin and I will take a God damn polygraph to that effect
Carmela Soprano : I want you to leave... please? I want you to leave me alone
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr. : what about the kids?
Carmela Soprano : yeah, it's horrible, God help them