Seinfeld (TV Series)

The Outing (1993)

Jerry Seinfeld: Jerry Seinfeld

Photos 

Quotes 

• [repeated line] 

  Jerry Seinfeld : [on homosexuality]  Not that there's anything wrong with that!

• Jerry Seinfeld : I'm outed! I wasn't even in!

• George Costanza : I just thought of a great name for myself if I ever become a porno actor.

  Jerry Seinfeld : Oh yeah, what, Buck Naked?

  George Costanza : Yeah. How did you know?

  Jerry Seinfeld : You told me that already, like 2 months ago.

• [first lines] 

  Jerry Seinfeld : I am getting a little tired of pretending I'm excited every time it's somebody's birthday. You know what I mean? What is the big deal? How many times do we have to celebrate that someone was born? Every year. Over and over. All you did was not die for 12 months. That's all you've done, as far as I could tell. Those astrology things, where they tell you all the people that have the same birthday as you... It's always an odd group of people, too, isn't it? It's like, Ed Asner, Elijah Mohammed, and Secretariat.

• George Costanza : Jerry, did you wash this pear?

  Jerry Seinfeld : Yeah, I washed it.

  George Costanza : It looks like it hasn't been washed.

  Jerry Seinfeld : [annoyed]  So *wash it*.

  George Costanza : You hear the way he talks to me?

  Sharon : You should hear how *my* boyfriend talks to me...

• George Costanza : Let me ask you something. What do you think of this shirt?

  Sharon : It's nice.

  George Costanza : Jerry said he didn't like it...

  Jerry Seinfeld : I didn't say I didn't like it. I said it was okay...

  George Costanza : No, you said you didn't like it.

  Jerry Seinfeld : Oh, so what if I don't like it! Is that like the end of the world or something?

• [last lines] 

  Jerry Seinfeld : I am not gay. I am, however, thin, single and neat. Sometimes if someone's thin, single and neat, people assume they are gay, because that is the stereotype. You normally don't think of gay people as fat, sloppy and married. Although I'm sure there are. I don't want to perpetuate the stereotype. I'm sure they're the minority, though, within the gay community. Probably discriminated against. Because of that, people say to them, "You know, Joe, I enjoy being gay with you, but it's about time, you know, you got in shape, tucked your shirt in, and lost the wife." But if people are going to assume that people that are neat are gay, maybe instead of doing this: "You know, I think Joe might be a little..." They should vacuum. "You know, I think Joe might be... -- Yeah. I got a feeling he's a little..."