Sabrina the Teenage Witch (TV Series)

Five Easy Pieces of Libby (1998)

Jenna Leigh Green: Libby Chessler

Quotes 

• Mrs. Quick : I got a postcard from Valerie, she's really enjoying her trip to D.C.

  [Reading postcard] 

  Mrs. Quick : Hi, everyone! I've visited the Vietnam Memorial, the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier, and JFK's grave. This place is really fun!

  Libby Chessler : Sounds like a big loser town to me.

  Mrs. Quick : I have an important announcement to make: the school will be entering a float in the town's Democracy Daze celebration.

  Harvey Kinkle : [to Sabrina]  Great. I get to hear my Dad's Grenada story again.

  Mrs. Quick : Now who would like to be in charge of putting the float together?

  [Sabrina and Libby both raise their hands] 

  Mrs. Quick : Oh, my.

  [Looks at Valerie's postcard from Washington] 

  Mrs. Quick : Well, I think this would be the perfect opportunity for the two of you to embody our democracy's two party system and work together.

  Sabrina Spellman : What?

• Libby Chessler : [Sabrina, Libby and other students are working on the float]  The school guidelines state that the float is required to have flowers. The rest of the design is up to me.

  Sabrina Spellman : Don't you mean "us"?

  Libby Chessler : Well, I'll be using "me" as shorthand for "us". I've already got the floral design in my head...

  Sabrina Spellman : Oh! Well I'm glad your butt is working. Oh, I'll be using "butt" as shorthand for your head.

• Libby Chessler : [Sabrina is rehearsing with Libby and the other cheerleaders]  Okay, let's do it again. Sabrina, if you insist on actually doing the cheers, you have to stop screaming "Please, let me die!"

• Libby Chessler : Okay, you guys can take a break. You can go get a drink of water, and think about how you can be more like me.

• Libby Chessler : Why have you decided to become my shadow all of a sudden?

  Sabrina Spellman : Well, I figured since we're gonna be working together, you know, maybe we could find a common ground.

  Libby Chessler : Any ground I found with you would, indeed, be common.

  Sabrina Spellman : [Chuckles nervously]  You know, wait, I'm just trying to get to know you better.

  Libby Chessler : Well, I'm popular, confident, non-freakish. Everything you're not. And if you insist on traipsing after me, could you at least wear a higher quality perfume?

  [Walks off] 

  Sabrina Spellman : Okay, enough. Nothing is worth this. I don't care what happens to me.

  [Forces herself away from Libby, breaking the spell; there is an explosion] 

  Sabrina Spellman : Libby! Oh, no!

  [Picks up box] 

  Sabrina Spellman : I turned her into a puzzle!

  [Reading box] 

  Sabrina Spellman : For ages three and up?

• Sabrina Spellman : [Sabrina thinks the puzzle is complete]  Oh, no, there's still a piece missing!

  [Looks at the hourglass] 

  Sabrina Spellman : And time just ran out!

  Quizmaster Albert : Don't worry. That piece doesn't exist yet. It's Libby's compassion for others. And you have to gradually fill that space by showing compassion for Libby, even when she doesn't show it for you. In other words, learn to work together?

  Sabrina Spellman : I get it.

  Quizmaster Albert : Mmhm.

  Sabrina Spellman : And by the way, could this lesson be any more heavy handed?

  Quizmaster Albert : Well, I could've been behind a pulpit! See ya.

  [Disappears; the Libby puzzles turns into Libby herself] 

  Libby Chessler : What... is going on? What am I doing here?

  Sabrina Spellman : Oh, you just came by to see if I needed a ride. I don't.

  Libby Chessler : I would not! I'm getting out of here.

  Sabrina Spellman : Uh, wait, Libby. Are you okay?

  Libby Chessler : I'm fine. Once again, weirdness reigns whenever Sa-freakna's around.

  [Leaves] 

  Sabrina Spellman : Oh, yeah. Sympathy for Libby. Piece of cake!

• Sabrina Spellman : [Trying to be nice]  You know, Libby, I have to admit, your side of the float is looking pretty good.

  Libby Chessler : I'm glad you're willing to state the obvious.

  Sabrina Spellman : Oh, well, I... I'm going to accept that as a compliment.

  Libby Chessler : Then you could use a dictionary!

• Sabrina Spellman : [the Quizmaster's spell has made it impossible for Sabrina to be apart from Libby]  Where are you going?

  Libby Chessler : To cheerleading practice?

  [Raises pom-poms] 

  Libby Chessler : Ready? Get lost!

  Sabrina Spellman : Hey, you know that would make a really good story for the school paper? A day in the life of a cheerleader!

  Libby Chessler : But, you despise cheerleaders. And cheerleaders despise you.

  Sabrina Spellman : You're afraid I'll write a puff piece, aren't you?

  [Libby walks away, and Sabrina is pulled along behind her] 

  Sabrina Spellman : Well, look, don't run!

• Sabrina Spellman : [Still trying to be nice]  Libby, um, I could use some help with my crêpe paper.

  Libby Chessler : I have a box of matches?

  Sabrina Spellman : [Knowing about Libby's love for her Grandmother]  But it's just that I wanted to get done this weekend, so I could, uh, visit my Grandma.

  Libby Chessler : Oh.

  [pauses] 

  Libby Chessler : Well. I would hate for part of the float to look like you did it.

  [Rolls eyes] 

  Libby Chessler : Okay, I'll help.

  Sabrina Spellman : Thanks! You know, Libby, sometimes you're a real puzzle.

  Libby Chessler : No talking!