Red Dwarf (TV Series)

Stasis Leak (1988)

Chris Barrie: Rimmer

Photos 

Quotes 

• The Cat : [to Rimmer]  What *is* it?

  Rimmer : It's a rent in the space-time continuum.

  The Cat : [to Lister]  What *is* it?

  Lister : The stasis room freezes time, you know, makes time stand still. So whenever you have a leak, it must preserve whatever it's leaked into, and it's leaked into this room.

  The Cat : [to Rimmer]  What *is* it?

  Rimmer : It's singularity, a point in the Universe where the normal laws of space and time don't apply.

  The Cat : [to Lister]  What *is* it?

  Lister : It's a hole back into the past.

  The Cat : Oh, a magic door! Well, why didn't you say?

• Arnold Rimmer (alive) : On the morning of Febuary the 26th, at 0800 hrs, did engage in conversation with second technician Rimmer, Arnold J...

  Captain Frank Hollister : For crying out loud, Rimmer!

  Arnold Rimmer (alive) : - the outcome of which was a proposal by the aforementioned Lister to the aforementioned Rimmer to cook him breakfast.

  Captain Frank Hollister : Okay, I'm getting the picture.

  Arnold Rimmer (alive) : Breakfast comprised of two eggs, three rashers of bacon, a grilled tomato, two sausages, a small portion of fried potatoes... and a large quantity of _mushrooms_. Having consumed this repast, second technician Rimmer, Arnold J. experienced what can only be described as a voyage to trip-out city. To whit, a major hallucinogenic fit.

  Captain Frank Hollister : Lister, is this true?

  Lister : No, sir. I'm sure it was only one egg.

  Arnold Rimmer (alive) : The aforementioned Rimmer, to whit, me, then attended inspection parade. He was totally naked except for a pair of mock-leather driving gloves and some blue swimming goggles. Under the influence of this psychadelic breakfast he went on to attack two senior officers, believing them to be giraffes who were armed and dangerous.

• Rimmer : I loved that little lemming. I built him a little wall he could hurl himself off of.

• Rimmer : Now kindly cluck off before I extract your giblets and shove a large seasoned onion between the lips you never kiss with.

• Rimmer : I'm you from the future. I've come to warn you, in three million years you'll be dead.

  Arnold Rimmer (alive) : Will I really?

  Rimmer : Yes, unless you do something about it now.

  Arnold Rimmer (alive) : What do you suggest? Give up white bread? More roughage?

• Arnold Rimmer : [to Captain Hollister]  With respect, sir, you've got your head up your fat arse.

• Lister : Where are you coming from, Rimmer? You don't even like me!

  Rimmer : Don't I?

  Lister : No.

  Rimmer : Fine.

  [He sits silently, fuming] 

  Lister : [uncertainly]  You don't, though, do you? You don't even like me.

  Rimmer : That's what you think, is it?

  Lister : Yeah.

  Rimmer : [after a pause]  I will tell you something that will probably stun you rigid.

  Lister : What?

  Rimmer : You're right, I don't like you.