- Jeff Randall: [about Stuart Boyle] Come shopping at Boyle's, the fat boys' superstore. Shopping at Boyle's, you'll get what you're looking for, there's so much fat to see and the parking is free...
- Prof. Wyvern: Beware the idle tongue of wrath, that with malice makes thee scoff. If thou thy chosen one deny, thy soul be risked, for all eterniteye.
- Marty Hopkirk: Eterniteye?
- Prof. Wyvern: You heard.
- Jeff Randall: Ah, Fire doors, Stuart, traditionally susceptible to assault by cricket bat.
- [the doors catch fire]
- Jeannie: My hero.
- Stuart Boyle: I thought you said...
- Jeff Randall: Oh, shut it, fatty!
- Prof. Wyvern: I'm afraid you have strayed into very deep waters.
- Marty Hopkirk: But I was talking to Jeff...
- Prof. Wyvern: You were talking to Mr Randall when a physical barrier seemed to spring up between you, yes?
- Marty Hopkirk: Yes.
- Prof. Wyvern: You couldn't hear what he was saying, it was as though the sound had been turned down, yes?
- Marty Hopkirk: Yes.
- Prof. Wyvern: And now you want me to take you back there, and restore the status quo, yes?
- Marty Hopkirk: Yes!
- Prof. Wyvern: No.
- Marty Hopkirk: [deep] No.