- [Meg is supervising the women as they get ready for the TV crew to arrive, Colleen enters]
- Colleen Powell: Oh my God! Well I think allowing them to wear make-up was a huge mistake. Look at them! Half of them look like tarts.
- Meg Morris: Half of them are.
- [first lines]
- Lizzie Birdsworth: How come they've released him and Lainie is still here?
- Helen Smart: Hmm. You know what I think? I think we have just witnessed the big cover up.
- Lizzie Birdsworth: What do you mean?
- Helen Smart: Well, it wouldn't look too good for the department or the cops if it was known that they mistook a male prisoner for a female prisoner. Can you imagine the publicity?
- Lainie Dobson: Well I don't care why they did it. I'm just glad he's out. But I don't know what I'm gonna do without him.
- [Meg, Colleen and Joan are on a coffee/cigarette break in the staff room]
- Meg Morris: And that's it? Alan Farmer never existed. Do they honestly think they are going to get away with this?
- Colleen Powell: Well, there are now no records to show he was in here or that he was arrested.
- Meg Morris: Officially yes, but you know how things get around.
- Colleen Powell: It is up to us to make sure they don't. Otherwise we'd be a complete laughing stock.
- Joan 'The Freak' Ferguson: That's gonna happen anyway, isn't it? When the news gets out about the soft approach to the prisoners. The public wont thank us for turning the place into a hoilday resort.
- Meg Morris: Yeah. Well I don't agree wth that. We've always had far less trouble from the women when they're being treated more humanely.
- Colleen Powell: Well... that's not quite true, Meg. They usually take advantage of the situation and end up spoiling it for themselves.
- Meg Morris: Well not the majority of them. There's only been the odd troublemaker.. And they'd be in troubnle even if they spent their time in chains.
- Joan 'The Freak' Ferguson: Maybe they'll let us give that a try when all this fails? And it's bound to.
- Colleen Powell: Look! It is the department's decison, so it's up to us to make it work. I'd say we have Jill Clarke's report to thank for the change of attitude.
- Meg Morris: I was very dubious about her being in here, but obviusly it's all worked out for the best.
- Joan 'The Freak' Ferguson: Oh for God's sake! Save us from the sweetness and light brigade!
- [Joan exits]
- Meg Morris: And God save us from a fascist regime.
- Helen Smart: They are bending over backwards to keep us happy and there's gotta be a reason.
- Lizzie Birdsworth: Well I say let's take everything we can get while the going is good. Do you reckon there is anything else we could ask for?
- Maxine Daniels: Yeah! How about letting our boyfriends in for occasional visits? Say overnight?
- Lizzie Birdsworth: Well, we used to have conjungle visits some time ago but they stopped those; it caused a lot of bad feelings.
- Maxine Daniels: Bad feelings, eh? I'd call 'em terrific!
- [they laugh]
- Helen Smart: Well, I was thinking of asking the department if they'd mind me carrying on my trade while I was in here.
- Lizzie Birdsworth: Well, you'd have one regular customer, old Ferguson!
- [she laughs just as Joan enters]
- Joan 'The Freak' Ferguson: Alright you lot! Move it out
- [she leaves]
- Helen Smart: [to Lizzie] I think I might give it a miss.
- Nola McKenzie: You're all a pack of fools! Can't you see what they're doing? The more they give you now the more it'll hurt when they take it away.
- Lizzie Birdsworth: Gawd! You're a bloody great pain in the bum, McKenzie!
- Maxine Daniels: This is terrific Lizzie! What do reckon you'll ask for next time?
- Lizzie Birdsworth: Couple of new dresses, mink coat, and maybe a bikini to wear during my exercise period!
- [she laughs]
- Lizzie Birdsworth: What about you?
- Maxine Daniels: I reckon I'll ask for a blow-up Mel Gibson doll.
- Lizzie Birdsworth: Oh yeah! I think I'll have one of Gary Cooper.
- Maxine Daniels: Who's Gary Cooper?
- Lizzie Birdsworth: Well, he's almost as masculine as the Freak and twice as pretty!
- [they laugh before running into Joan in the corridor]
- Joan 'The Freak' Ferguson: What's so funny, Birdsworth? Have you been on the booze again?