Photos
Quotes
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[Jeremy is giving Mark an 'overdose' of Lempsip]
Jeremy Usborne : [voiceover] Shit, could this actually kill him? It's not going to kill him, it's just loads and loads of medicine. He'll probably wake up in three days completely cured.
[to Mark]
Jeremy Usborne : You should drink all that down.
Mark Corrigan : OK thanks, I will.
[He continues to drink mug of Lemsip]
Jeremy Usborne : That's right, drink it all down. OK, have a nice nap.
Mark Corrigan : Thanks.
Jeremy Usborne : [voiceover] It'll be OK, it's not like I'm going to rape him... I could rape him... I'm not going to rape him.
[!]
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Jeremy Usborne : You da man!
Mark Corrigan : I'm a man!
Jeremy Usborne : It's you "da" man.
Mark Corrigan : Whatever, Jeremy, let's not quibble. I'm a man!
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Super Hans : [in the bathroom] I can't get out! Let me out!
Jeremy Usborne : It's all right, Hans, it's just the handle, it's funny, you need to lift it...
Super Hans : This is bullshit!
[he kicks the door down]
Super Hans : Sorry, lads. Locked doors. Little switch just flicks, you know? Ever since Dad locked me in the airing cupboard to monitor the home brew.
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Jeremy Usborne : It's just, Big Suze and everyone, they're coming over. And you might want to make yourself scarce because we're going to be taking some magic mushrooms.
Mark Corrigan : Magic mushrooms?
Jeremy Usborne : Yes, and we're gonna smash down the doors of perception so we can see all the stuff that...
Mark Corrigan : Isn't really there.
Jeremy Usborne : That is really there but we don't normally see because we're so transfixed on...
Mark Corrigan : The stuff that is really there.
Jeremy Usborne : Oh, it's so simple for you, isn't it? But the truth that you're so scared of hearing is that in fact reality and fantasy are exactly the same thing.
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Mark Corrigan : You let Super Hans use for my bed for... filth!
Jeremy Usborne : [very poorly pretending to care] Oh, no. They didn't go in there did they? Oh, that really is too much. Oh, I'm annoyed now. I'm so annoyed with them. That is too much.
Mark Corrigan : Well, where in our massive duplex did you think they'd be? In one of the guest suites, or the billiard room?
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Jeremy Usborne : Mark's going to Frankfurt, and I thought maybe, if you fancied, magic mushroom party at my place.
Big Suze : Oh, I don't know. Magic mushrooms? Sounds a bit scary.
Jeremy Usborne : Oh Suze, it's not scary. You just lose a sense of who you are and all that shit.
Big Suze : Will I still be able to play the piano?
Jeremy Usborne : Of course, Suze, they're mushrooms, they're completely natural. Nothing natural ever hurt anybody, that's a scientific fact.
Big Suze : I suppose in a way it's the sort of thing I should be doing. If it's something I don't want to do, then it's probably something I should definetely try, you know what I mean?
Jeremy Usborne : Yeah, exactly. I mean, if people only did everything they wanted, everyone would just spend all day sitting on the carpet, watching the poker channel, wanking and eating those expensive German biscuits.
[Suze gives him a look]
Jeremy Usborne : Probably.
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Jeremy Usborne : Mark, stop, relax, it's OK, it's fine. You're recuperating. Have some lunch.
[hands him a bowl of crisps]
Jeremy Usborne : Three different flavours all mixed up. Mmm, exciting. And then after that, beans. Until you're better, I'm going to cook all your meals.
Mark Corrigan : Right. Thanks. Crisps and beans.
[voiceover]
Mark Corrigan : What will come first, scurvy or rickets?
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[Jeremy is making friends with the carpenter who is fixing their bathroom door]
Jeremy Usborne : [voiceover] Shit, we're so angry together. The righteous indignation of the common man. Maybe we could start a union, the woodworkers and general persons union.
[to the carpenter]
Jeremy Usborne : Listen bro, you fancy a bit of a jam? I've got a bongo, we could have a cheeky toke.
Andy : Yeah, why not? Sweet as.
Jeremy Usborne : [voiceover] Maybe we'll become best mates and he'll train me up to be a carpenter like Jesus. And if I get crucified, he'll start a religion in my name. Jeremism. I'm a Jeremist. Nice.
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[about Big Suze]
Jeremy Usborne : [voiceover] I bet she even does nice poos, little Maltesers that smell like The Body Shop.
