- Morticia Addams: Oh, we don't want money.
- Gomez Addams: We have lots of money.
- Morticia Addams: We want a new bear.
- Gomez Addams: Because that we don't have.
- Morticia Addams: Without a bear, the foyer looks... well, bare.
- Neighbor: Isn't this cute? A bake sale. How much for a cupcake?
- Wednesday Addams: One hundred dollars.
- Neighbor: That's ridiculous. You kids are out of your minds.
- Pugsley Addams: Thanks, it runs in the family.
- Morticia Addams: We're going to find a new bear ourselves.
- Fielding: But where? I already looked all over town.
- Gomez Addams: There's your first mistake. Bears prefer the woods.
- Morticia Addams: Oh, we haven't been camping in so long.
- Gomez Addams: This way we can kill two birds with one stone.
- Morticia Addams: We do want a bear, darling.
- Gomez Addams: Oh, good point, Querida, I'll bring two stones!
- Pugsley Addams: [Pugsley has wrecked his father's prize train engine] Father's going to be so disappointed in me.
- Wednesday Addams: Quit thinking of yourself. What about me? I'll have no one to torture when I'm an only child.