- [Sipowicz and Clark are examining a dead body]
- Ian Braithwaite: Uh... pardon me, so sorry. I don't mean to appear maudlin, but well, um, no one's going to believe me back home. It would mean a great deal to me if I could have my picture taken with you both.
- Det. Andy Sipowicz: Nuh-no. Show's over, pal.
- Ian Braithwaite: We've had such a terrible time in your city. This would go a long way to making it...
- Det. Andy Sipowicz: Why don't you take off.
- Ian Braithwaite: Certainly.
- [turns away]
- Det. Andy Sipowicz: [to Clark] That little dickhead is gonna snap a picture regardless. Watch.
- [Ian turns to take a photo as Sipowicz and Clark both give him the middle finger]
- Ian Braithwaite: Brilliant!
- John Irvin: Have you signed the card?
- Det. Andy Sipowicz: [after John passes him a giant card] What the hell?
- John Irvin: I needed one big enough for everyone in the precinct to sign.
- Det. Andy Sipowicz: Are there going to be pony rides?
- Det. Connie McDowell: It's a nice card, John.
- Det. Andy Sipowicz: [after signing the card] Any word yet on who's replacing Rodgriguez?
- Det. Connie McDowell: No, and I've been calling around.
- Det. John Clark, Jr.: [Reads Andy's message as he's preparing to sign the card] "Hope it works out"?
- Det. Andy Sipowicz: Yeah.
- Det. Connie McDowell: Andy!
- Det. Andy Sipowicz: What? I hope it works out for the guy
- [looks over at Clark]
- Det. Andy Sipowicz: Why don't you mind your own business over there, huh?
- Det. Connie McDowell: "Hope it works out" sounds like you don't think it will.
- Det. Andy Sipowicz: If I'd have thought that, I'd have wrote it.
- Det. Connie McDowell: Just add "good luck" or something
- Det. Andy Sipowicz: Connie, it's not like he's gonna be framing this thing.
- Sgt. Eddie Gibson: Gentlemen and ladies of the 15th, I've arrived!
- [salutes Rodriguez]
- Sgt. Eddie Gibson: MIssion aboard, Lieutenant.
- Lt. Tony Rodriguez: Come in, Eddie.
- Det. Andy Sipowicz: It's busy, Gibson. What are you doing here?
- Sgt. Eddie Gibson: Ha, Ha, Andy.
- [to Rodriguze]
- Sgt. Eddie Gibson: Sorry for the boxes coming in piecemeal. My car broke down so I'm bringing in loads in the wife's Festiva.
- Det. Andy Sipowicz: [surprised] Those are YOUR boxes?
- Sgt. Eddie Gibson: Course they are.
- Lt. Tony Rodriguez: You're the new C.O.?
- Sgt. Eddie Gibson: The Chief of Detectives didn't give you a head's up?
- Det. Connie McDowell: No.
- Sgt. Eddie Gibson: Oh, geez! I'll come back after the tour.
- Lt. Tony Rodriguez: No, no. It's all right. Come on in.
- Sgt. Eddie Gibson: Chief of Ds told me today was the day, so I figured they'd tell you. But maybe it's for the best because I got about a million questions, Lieutenant. And I'm eager to pick your brain.
- Lt. Tony Rodriguez: Well, let's get started
- [gestures]
- Lt. Tony Rodriguez: your office.
- Sgt. Eddie Gibson: Guys, just so you know, I'm well aware of the abilities of the personnel on this squad and I got no intention of fixing what ain't broke. And my management style? Hands off. Unless one of you really steps on your Johnson. Kidding.
- Det. Andy Sipowicz: [after Eddie goes into the office with Tony] This is April Fool's, right?