M*A*S*H (TV Series)

Officer of the Day (1974)

Wayne Rogers: Capt. 'Trapper John' McIntyre

Photos 

Quotes 

• Hawkeye : [Closing scene; dictating end-of-day report to Radar in LTC Blake's office]  The North Korean prisoner suspected of espionage, recovering satisfactorily, will be turned over to military intelligence... as soon as somebody can be found with military intelligence. Paragraph. Examined, diagnosed, and treated a total of five Kim Lucks, a new Kim Luck record I hope will stand for a long time. Paragraph. Property of Corporal O'Reilly returned. Father and teddy bear doing nicely.

  Trapper : [Trapper sticks his head in the door]  Hey, you guys wanna see the pinstripe suit of all time?

  Hawkeye : Yeah.

  [Trapper walks in the office. The stripes on the suit are horizontal instead of vertical] 

  Hawkeye : [laughing]  He's a great tailor, but with a lousy sense of direction.

  [laughing continues] 

• Margaret : [Frank wants a war prisoner released to Colonel Flagg. A doctor must sign to release the prisoner; Frank and Margaret are goading Hawkeye and Trapper into signing the release]  Frank, *you* can sign for it! You're a doctor!

  Frank Burns : Hey, that's right! I *am* a doctor!

  Hawkeye : Your secret is safe with us, Frank.

  Trapper : His *patients* are definitely never going to find out.

• Trapper : I do believe there's a new sheriff in town.

  Hawkeye : That's right, stranger. I'm gonna make everybody in this town do just what I want 'em to. I think I'll start with the girls.