- Hawkeye records a letter to his Dad, detailing the exploits of a mad Turkish soldier, the loss of a Luxembourg Lieutenant's corpse, and a lieutenant's strong-arm tactics to obtain medical care for a comrade.
- Hawkeye recounts the "well rounded day of insanity," of the previous OR session, on a tape recorder for his father. It starts with a bus full of wounded UN soldiers; Frank is supposed to be in charge of their triage. One soldier, wrapped in a tight "sandwich" stretcher, is a Turk whom even Klinger calls crazy. With a "drugstore" already pumped into the Turk's arm, he is still able to slice through canvas, wounds and all, and wave a huge knife at the triage team. Frank is chicken, so Klinger has to give the Turk more morphine. But, the Turkish Rasputin wakes up again, before his surgery; he yells, sedates Henry and escapes. A Luxembourg lieutenant was supposed to be on the bus, but he cannot be found. U.S. soldier, Lt. Smith, really wants Sgt. Bryan taken out of the jeep and given immediate top priority. Colonel Blanche, Commander of Luxumbourg forces, arrives looking for a Lt. Henri Batiste LeClerq; Radar says LeClerq is dead and his body is missing. As Frank and Trapper operate on Sgt. Bryan, at gunpoint, Blanche is upset his Lt. cannot be found. And, one murderous Turk is on the loose. When Lt. Smith collapses at the doctors' feet, Trapper feels bad; Lt. Smith was just as badly wounded as his buddy for whom he demanded treatment. A military ceremony resolves problems. But, Radar, clad in a toga, is an unwilling date to find "Cinli." Radar cannot hold his prune juice.—LA-Lawyer
- Hawkeye records a letter to his Dad telling him about the day. A Turkish soldier refuses to be treated because he wants to get back to the front. Another soldier wants his Sargent to be treated first and won't take no for an answer. A soldier from Luxembourg is misplaced.—Kathy Hofmann
- Hawkeye recounts the "well rounded day of insanity" of the previous OR session (Also known as the "Full Rich day"), on a tape recorder (Stolen from the Tokyo PX) for his father. It starts with a bus full of wounded UN soldiers; Frank is supposed to be in charge of their triage (Assigning medical priority to the wounded).
One soldier, wrapped in a tight "sandwich" stretcher, is a Turk whom even Klinger calls crazy. With a "drugstore" already pumped into the Turk's arm, he is still able to slice through canvas, wounds and all, and wave a huge knife at the triage team. Frank is chicken, so Klinger has to give the Turk more morphine. But, the Turkish Rasputin (Sirri Murad) wakes up again, before his surgery; he yells, sedates Henry (with the injection that was supposed to sedate him) and escapes.
A Luxembourg lieutenant was supposed to be on the bus, but he cannot be found. The bus manifest has confirmation of his presence, but he cannot be found by anyone. U.S. soldier, Lt. Smith (William Watson), really wants Sgt. Bryan taken out of the jeep (whom he has driven to the 4077th MASH) and given immediate top priority. Smith encounters Frank, who is more interested in military protocol than taking care of the wounded. Smith puts Frank at gunpoint, when he says that Bryan will be taken care of in due course. Smith then forces Bryan into Pre-op and confronts Henry to take him to into surgery. Hawkeye takes Smith out and tries to explain that in the hospital the most wounded takes the highest priority. Personal loyalties count for nothing. Smith understands, but wants Bryan taken care of. Colonel Blanche (Curtis Lowens), Commander of Luxumbourg forces, arrives looking for a Lt. Henri Batiste LeClerq; Radar says LeClerq is dead and his body is missing. Henry orders Radar to find Lt LClerq's (Michael Keller) body. Blanche promises not to leave without LeClerq's body.
As Frank and Trapper operate on Sgt. Bryan, at gunpoint, Blanche is upset his Lt. cannot be found. And, one murderous Turk is on the loose. When Lt. Smith collapses at the doctors' feet, Trapper feels bad; Lt. Smith was just as badly wounded as his buddy for whom he demanded treatment. Hawkeye and Trapper operate on Lt Smith Radar finds the Turkish soldier hiding in the kitchen and finds Hawkeye to help. Hawkeye determines that the Turk simply wants to go back to his unit and fight the Chinese. Hawkeye gives him clothes and a jeep and promises to drive him to the front. The Turk calls him "Good Joe". Hawkeye asks Radar to mix sedative in the prune juice and offer to the Turk, so that he can fall asleep and brought back to the camp. Radar has drunk the same prune juice and falls asleep at the wheel. The Turk drives him back to the back and takes off alone.
since Radar cant find LeClerq, Henry offers to conduct a military ceremony in his honor. The band plays the Luxembourg national anthem and LeClerq (who was lying in Postop), hears it and comes out and finds Blanche. Turns out LeClerq was well taken care of, after all.
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