Friends (TV Series)

The One with All the Poker (1995)

Matt LeBlanc: Joey Tribbiani

Photos 

Quotes 

• Phoebe : Okay, Joey, your bet.

  Joey : [throws down his cards]  I fold like a cheap hooker who got hit in the stomach by a fat guy with sores on his face.

  [looks round the group, sees they're all offended] 

  Joey : Oh, I'm out.

• Ross : Look, Rachel. I play to win, and in order for me to win, other people have to lose. So if you're going to play with me, don't expect me to be a nice guy, 'cause when I play poker...

  [wipes his hands] 

  Joey : Yeah?

  Ross : I'm not a nice guy.

• Ross : [looking at Rachel's resume]  Rach, did you proof read these?

  Rachel : Uh, yeah. Why?

  Ross : Uh, nothing. I'm sure they'll be impressed with your excellent "compuper skills".

  Rachel : Oh my God! Oh, do you think it's on all of them?

  Joey : Ah, no, I'm sure the Xerox machine caught a few.

• Phoebe : Alright, here's my $7.50, but I think you should know that this money is cursed.

  Joey : What?

  Phoebe : Oh, I cursed it. So bad things will happen to he who spends it.

  Chandler : That's alright, I'll take it. Bad things happen to me anyway.

• Chandler : There just don't happen to be any women in our game.

  Joey : Yeah, we just don't happen to know any women that know how to play poker.

  Monica : Oh, please, that is such a lame excuse! That's a typical guy response.

  Ross : Excuse me, do any of you know how to play?

  Monica , Rachel , Phoebe : No...

  Rachel : But you could teach us!

  Ross , Chandler , Joey : No...

• Ross : [Playing Pictionary, Rachel draws a bean]  bean... bean

  Joey : The Unbearable Lightness of Being!

  Rachel : Yes!

• Joey : [about a poker hand]  There was chocolate on the 3. It looked like an 8. All right?

  Ross : You should've seen him. "Read 'em and weep".

  Chandler : And then he did.

• Monica : That You Get. THAT YOU GET

  Rachel : No

  Phoebe : No

  Ross : No

  Joey : No

  Chandler : No