Friends (TV Series)

The One Where Monica Gets a Roommate (1994)

Jennifer Aniston: Rachel Green

Photos 

Quotes 

• Ross : You know, you probably didn't know this, but back in high school, I had a major crush on you.

  Rachel : I knew.

  Ross : You did. Oh... I always figured you just thought I was Monica's geeky older brother.

  Rachel : I did.

• Monica : [wide grin on her face]  Did you get any sleep? Did you talk to Barry? I can't stop smiling.

  Rachel : I know, it looks like you slept with a hanger in your mouth.

• Rachel : I know that you and I kinda drifted apart, but you're the only person I knew who lived here in the city

  Monica : Who wasn't invited to the wedding...?

  Rachel : Oh, I was kinda hoping that wouldn't be an issue.

• [Rachel is supposed to be cutting up her credit cards] 

  Everybody : Cut, cut, cut, cut.

  Rachel : [cuts a card]  You know what? I think we can leave it at that. It was kind of a symbolic gesture...

  Monica : Rachel, that was a library card.

  [Everybody cheers her on, and she reluctantly cuts a credit card] 

  Chandler : You know, if you listen closely, you can hear a thousand retailers scream.

• Monica : Paul, this is everybody. Everybody, this is Paul.

  Joey : Hey, Paul, the wine guy.

  Ross : Hey, Paul.

  Phoebe : Hey, Paul.

  Rachel : Hi, Paul.

  Chandler : I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name. Paul, was it?

• Rachel : Guess what?

  Ross : You got a job?

  Rachel : Are you kidding? I'm trained for nothing! I was laughed at in 12 interviews today.

  Chandler : And yet you're surprisingly upbeat.

  Rachel : Well, you would be too if you got new boots with 50% off!

  Chandler : Oh, how well you know me.

• Rachel : [on the phone with her dad]  Well, maybe it's my decision. Well, maybe I don't need your money. Wait, wait! I said maybe.

• Rachel : Well, it was about half an hour before the wedding and I was in the room where we were keeping all the presents and someone had bought us this beautiful Limoges gravy boat. And I realized I was more turned on by this gravy boat than by Barry. And that's when it hit me how much Barry looks like Mr. Potato Head!

• Rachel : It's like all my life everybody keeps telling that I'm a shoe. You're a shoe, you're a shoe, you're a shoe! But what if I don't want to be a shoe anymore? Maybe I'm a purse, or a hat... I don't want you to buy me a hat, I'm saying I am a hat! It's a metaphore, daddy!

• Rachel : So, like you guys all have jobs?

  Monica : Yeah we all have jobs, that's how we buy stuff.

• Monica : You can't live off your parents your whole life.

  Rachel : I know that. That's why I was getting married.

• Rachel : [serving]  Isn't this amazing? I mean, I've never made coffee in my entire life!

• Rachel : Oh, and wish me luck.

  Monica : What for?

  Rachel : I'm gonna go get one of those... job things.