The Flintstones (TV Series)

Fred Flintstone Woos Again (1961)

Frank Nelson: Clerk

Quotes 

• Fred Flintstone : [about Stonewall]  Imagine, a man like him sweeping floors. Oh, the marrying business must be falling off.

  Clerk : And what's wrong with sweeping floors? It happens to be his job.

  Fred Flintstone : His job? But he's the Justice of the Peace.

  Clerk : Stonewall? Oh, no, no. Judge Wedrock has been the Justice of the Peace here for 30 years. That man is his brother-in-law, and is he a card. He's always pulling off some kind of a joke. He pulled a gag yesterday that was a lulu. Get this... a couple stopped in at the coffee shop to have their marriage ceremony performed again by Judge Wedrock. Well, Stonewall told them that the judge was in jail for marrying people without a license. And...

  [laughs] 

  Clerk : All the time, the judge was in the back taking a nap!

  [laughs] 

  Clerk : Ain't that hilarious?

  Fred Flintstone : [sarcastically]  Ha, ha, ha, ha. Yeah, yeah. Really tickles my funny bone... but I'm gonna BREAK his!

• Fred Flintstone : Well, there it is, Wilma. The old Rock Mountain Inn. Hasn't changed a bit, has it?

  Wilma Flintstone : [giggles]  Ah, I wonder if the desk clerk will remember us.

  Fred Flintstone : After 15 years? Nah.

  [later] 

  Clerk : Well, it's you again! How do you do, Mrs. Flintstone? You look exactly like you did, eh, about 15 years ago, wasn't it?

  Wilma Flintstone : [giggles]  That's right, and thank you for the compliment.

  Clerk : Yes. But who's the fat guy with you? I don't remember him.

  Fred Flintstone : Fat guy? Why, you... I'm Fred Flintstone, her husband.

  Clerk : Indeed. My, my. Well, Mr. Flintstone, you look like you've been living off the... fat of the land for 15 years.

  Fred Flintstone : One more crack like that, and you'll be living with a fat lip.