Fawlty Towers (TV Series)

Basil the Rat (1979)

Prunella Scales: Sybil Fawlty

Photos 

Quotes 

• Basil Fawlty : Manuel... my wife informs me that you're... depressed. Let me tell you something. Depression is a very bad thing. It's like a virus. If you don't stamp on it, it spreads throughout the mind, and then one day you wake up in the morning and you... you can't face life anymore!

  Sybil Fawlty : And then you open a hotel.

• [Polly struggles to keep Mr. Carnegie, the health inspector, from learning of Manuel's pet rat Basil, named after Basil Fawlty, running loose in the hotel] 

  Manuel : The Major try to kill Basil!

  Sybil Fawlty : Kill BASIL?

  Manuel : No, not Mr. Fawlty. I mean Basil, my little...

  Polly : [suddenly, before Manuel can say 'Rat' in front of the health inspector]  RATATOUILLE!

  Mr. Carnegie : Basil the little...

  Polly : Ratatouille. The chef calls the ratatouille 'Basil' because he puts quite a lot of basil in it.

  Manuel : He put Basil in the ratatouille?

  Polly : Yes!

  Manuel : ARGGGHHHHHHHH!

  [Manuel runs off to the kitchen screaming, Polly following] 

  Sybil Fawlty : [charmingly to Mr. Carnegie]  He's from Barcelona.

• Sybil Fawlty : [about Manuel's rat]  Perhaps it would be simplest to have him put to S-L-E-E-P.

  Basil Fawlty : Who? Him or the rat? Might get a discount if we have them both done.

  Manuel : 'Spleep'?

• Basil Fawlty : Do sit down, Mr. Carnegie.

  Sybil Fawlty : He just has, Basil.

  Mr. Carnegie : On a plate of veal.

  Basil Fawlty : Has it put you off?

  Mr. Carnegie : What?

  Basil Fawlty : Has it put you off the veal, at all?

  Mr. Carnegie : Well, I'm not eating THAT one if THAT'S what you mean!

• [Last lines, as Manuel drags the unconscious Basil across the room in the background] 

  Sybil Fawlty : I'm afraid it's started to rain again.

• Sybil Fawlty : They all said, at one time or another, how on Earth did the two of us ever get together. "Black magic," my mother says.

  Basil Fawlty : Well, she'd know, wouldn't she? Her and that cat.

• Sybil Fawlty : I cannot abide cruelty to living creatures.

  Basil Fawlty : Well, I'm a creature, you can abide it to me.

  Sybil Fawlty : You're not living.

• Basil Fawlty : Look at it from the point of view of the rat.

  Sybil Fawlty : What?

  Basil Fawlty : Well, would you want to spend the rest of your life with Manuel waiting on you?

• Sybil Fawlty : Well what are you going to do with it?

  Basil Fawlty : I don't know. I'll take it away. Let it go. Give it it's freedom.

  Sybil Fawlty : You can't do that, Basil. He wouldn't be able to defend himself.

  Basil Fawlty : He's a rat, isn't he?

  Sybil Fawlty : Well he's domesticated.

  [to the rat] 

  Sybil Fawlty : Aren't you?

  Basil Fawlty : Well, you're domesticated. You do alright. He's not going to get mugged by a gang of field mice, is he?

• Mr. Carnegie : I couldn't help noticing you had some veal over here...

  Basil Fawlty : Veal?

  Sybil Fawlty : Yes, it's Dutch.

  Basil Fawlty : Well, it's not Dutch, actually. It's, uh, Norwegian.

  Sybil Fawlty : Norwegian?

  Basil Fawlty : Yes. Not the absolute apex, quite honestly.

  Sybil Fawlty : Terry, the veal is Dutch, isn't it?

  Terry : Norwegian, Mrs. Fawlty.

  Mr. Carnegie : I've been in this business 20 years, I've never heard of Norwegian veal.

  Basil Fawlty : Well, they've only just branched into it. You know, I don't think it's a winner, frankly, more of a veal substitute. It's got a lot of air pockets in it, that sort of thing.

• Mr. Carnegie : [reacting to the sound of gunshots]  God! What was that?

  Basil Fawlty : Bloody television exploding again. I'll deal with it, you go upstairs.

  Mr. Carnegie : That was a gun!

  Sybil Fawlty : Yes, it did sound like it, didn't it?

• Sybil Fawlty : Here's your veal, Mr. Carnegie. Sorry for the delay.

  Ronald : He's just been given veal!

  Basil Fawlty : Uh, no, no. That's, uh, veal substitute.

  Ronald : Veal substitute?

  Basil Fawlty : Yes, it's not very good. It got rather held up on the boat. On the way over from, uh...

  Polly : Japan.

  Basil Fawlty : Norway. It's a... it's sort of a... Japo-Scandinavian imitation veal substitute, and I'm afraid that's the last slice, anyway.