The Dukes of Hazzard (TV Series)
Enos Strate to the Top (1980)
Sorrell Booke: Boss Hogg
Quotes
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Jefferson Davis 'Boss' Hogg : I've already found someone whose willing to kick back 50% of his pay!
Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane : Who? Who could be that stupid?
Jefferson Davis 'Boss' Hogg : My third cousin, twice removed, Cletus Hogg!
Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane : Uh, Cletus, C-Cletus Hogg?
Jefferson Davis 'Boss' Hogg : Yeah, Cousin Cletus Hogg!
Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane : Oh, he is stupid! I mean, I mean even the dipsticks call him a dipstick!
Jefferson Davis 'Boss' Hogg : Well then he'll fit in perfect with you, won't he?
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Jefferson Davis 'Boss' Hogg : If you're patrolling the street as a deputy sheriff, and you see an out-of-state car parked on the street, what do you do?
Deputy Cletus Hogg : Uh, walk right up to them nice folks and say,
[in exaggerated way:]
Deputy Cletus Hogg : "Hi, welcome to Hazzard County."
Jefferson Davis 'Boss' Hogg : Wrong. You pick this up
[old fire hydrant that just happens to be standing in his office]
Jefferson Davis 'Boss' Hogg : and you put it on the curb next to the car, and then you write 'em up a parking ticket.
Deputy Cletus Hogg : I never knew there was so much to being a deputy.