The Dick Van Dyke Show (TV Series)
Never Name a Duck (1962)
Morey Amsterdam: Buddy Sorrell
Quotes
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Maurice (Buddy) Sorrell : [looking through a box full of old toys] Hey, here's something for Ritchie: a bathtub toy with a plastic fish in it.
Robert 'Rob' Petrie : I think Ritchie's a little too old for plastic fish.
Sally Rogers : [taking the toy] I'll take it.
Maurice (Buddy) Sorrell : I don't want to be personal, but aren't you old enough to bathe with real fish?
Sally Rogers : It's not for me, it's for Mr. Henderson, my cat.
Maurice (Buddy) Sorrell : Your cat eats plastic fish?
Robert 'Rob' Petrie , Sally Rogers : [in unison] It's a plastic cat.
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Maurice (Buddy) Sorrell : Ahh, every bone in my brain aches.
Sally Rogers : Hey, you know what's good for that?
Maurice (Buddy) Sorrell : What?
Sally Rogers : When you get hone, get a bucket of warm water and soak your head for twenty minutes.
Maurice (Buddy) Sorrell : Thanks a lot - I'd drown.
Sally Rogers : Do you wanna get rid of the headache or not?
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Maurice (Buddy) Sorrell : [upon Mel entering] Hey, look who's here - Genie with the light brown scalp!
[observing Mel's box of props]
Maurice (Buddy) Sorrell : NOW I know what a producer does - delivers the garbage.
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Maurice (Buddy) Sorrell : [looking through a box full of old toys; pulling out a huge teddy bear] I'll take it for my wife. She can use it for a pin cushion.
Sally Rogers : It's a pretty big pin cushion.
Maurice (Buddy) Sorrell : She got big pins.
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Robert 'Rob' Petrie : What are we gonna do with live baby ducks?
Sally Rogers : No, what are *you* gonna do with live baby ducks? They can't come home with me unless they want to be cat food
Robert 'Rob' Petrie : Oh yeah. How about you, Buddy?
Maurice (Buddy) Sorrell : Oh, alright, I'll take 'em. My dog likes to eat between meals.