The Dick Van Dyke Show (TV Series)
I'd Rather Be Bald Than Have No Head at All (1964)
Morey Amsterdam: Buddy Sorrell
Quotes
-
Rob Petrie : [to Mel] When did you first, uh... first realize that, you know, you were... beginning to get bald?
Buddy Sorrell : When a near-sighted ostrich jumped on his head and tried to hatch it.
-
[Alan has approved this week's script]
Sally Rogers : Oh, good, good, then who's the surprise guest.
Rob Petrie : Are you ready? Ricard Vincente.
Sally Rogers : Oh, I love him!
Buddy Sorrell : That's no surprise.
Rob Petrie : That's right. Half the women in the country love him.
Buddy Sorrell : [boasting] Well, I happen to know his secret.
Sally Rogers : You do? Why don't you use it?
-
Sally Rogers : [to Rob] Now, look, first of all, you're not going bald. And even if you were, a man doesn't become less attractive just because he's bald. Some men are MORE attractive.
Mel Cooley : [entering] Rob...
Buddy Sorrell : You just lost your argument.
-
Sally Rogers : He wears a rug?
Buddy Sorrell : Ear-to-ear carpeting.
-
Buddy Sorrell : Hereditary, baloney. Look at my hair and both my father and mother were bald.
-
Buddy Sorrell : [helping Sally wind up a ball of yarn] Who you knittin' this for, King Kong?
Sally Rogers : I'm not knittin' anything.
Buddy Sorrell : Well, what is that?
Sally Rogers : It's a wool bowling ball. Can't stand noise.