- Stan Pembroke: [to Lila, who's just come home from her disastrous date with Van] ... You're grounded for three months. No TV, no stereo, no allowance, no phone. Your life is school, homework, eating, sleeping, and chores - *lots* of chores. And if you have any free time, I suggest you spend it dwelling on why you were grounded.
- [to Jill]
- Stan Pembroke: ... And *don't* bake her any cookies!
- Lila Pembroke: [deleted line; relieved] Thanks; for a moment, I was afraid you were gonna send me out on *another* date with Van. That would have been worse than *anything*.
- Stan Pembroke: [deleted line; serious] Actually, I considered grounding both your brothers *instead of* you - and telling them why.
- [Lila is shocked, but regains her composure]
- Lila Pembroke: [deleted line] ... You're right; I take back what I just said.