- Tobias Fünke: You're forgetting, Lindsay, that as a psychiatrist, I was a professional twice over - an analyst and a therapist. The world's first "analrapist".
- Lindsay Funke: Yeah, and you were almost arrested for those business cards.
- Tobias Fünke: [after showing the business card] Yes, but I didn't stop because of the police inquiries, I stopped to help raise our little girl. Where is Maeby, anyways?
- Narrator: Michael was afraid he had been caught in a lie about his family. The family was afraid they were caught by a woman they had clubbed, drugged, and left on a bench. It was awkward.
- Michael: That's why I had this meeting here, so Dad could not interfere.
- Larry: Interfere? I ought to pull down your pants and spank your ass raw.
- Michael: I'm sorry, have we met?
- Bob Loblaw: This is Larry Middleman, he's your father's surrogate.
- Michael: Surrogate?
- Larry: That's right, you dumb fuck!
- George Sr.: I hired this guy to wear a camera in his hat so he could be my eyes and ears while I'm stuck in this penthouse.
- Larry: This camera helps me keep tabs on you idiots... while this thing rubs my ankle raw.
- George Sr.: I mean, look at this thing...
- Larry: I can't even go in the hallway...
- George Sr.: Without hearing that...
- Larry: Beep. Beep. Beep.
- Bob Loblaw: [commercial] Are you a corporate executive facing these or other charges? You don't need double talk! You need Bob Loblaw! After all, why should you go to jail for a crime somebody else noticed?
- Buster: [Tobias hands Buster his business card] Ahhhh!
- Tobias Fünke: Oh, it's pronounced "Analrapist".
- Buster: It wasn't the pronunciation that bothered me.
- Narrator: On the next Arrested Development, Lindsay tries to pay off her debt to Bob Loblaw.
- Bob Loblaw: Why don't you get a maid's uniform and come over to my house?
- Lindsay Funke: No way to misinterpret that...
- Narrator: [Lindsay is next seen in a maid's uniform hauling out trash] Except the one...
- Tobias Fünke: See, Buster, it wasn't a loose seal you couldn't stand up to, it was Lucille. Ooh, I'm getting chills. If this were a Lifetime Moment Of Truth movie, this would be our act break.
- Narrator: [music begins playing] But it wasn't.
- Bob Loblaw: I'd be very careful of these British people. They're gonna try to get their hands on any evidence they can to hurt the family.
- George Sr.: So you're saying shred the evidence?
- Bob Loblaw: No, that's illegal. The prosecution is entitled to that evidence. Without it, they don't have a case.
- George Sr.: So you're saying shred the evidence.
- Bob Loblaw: That's a felony. And I certainly couldn't endorse anything like that.
- George Sr.: Got ya.
- [to Larry]
- George Sr.: Wink.
- Larry: Wink. Did you say wink? Or did you wink?
- Michael: He said that too, Dad.
- Michael: You know, Gob, instead of trying to impress your fake father, maybe you should spend some time with your real son.
- Gob Bluth: Steve Holt's not my son.
- George-Michael Bluth: Steve Holt? The moron jock?
- Gob Bluth: That's my son, you pothead.
- Michael: [Gob attacks George-Michael] Hey, that's my son!