Are You Being Served? (TV Series)
Dear Sexy Knickers... (1973)
Nicholas Smith: Mr. Rumbold
Quotes
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Mr. Dick Lucas : [Mr. Humphries has been caught "putting the knee in" a jacket and has been brought before Mr. Rumbold] You see, it was like this, you see, Sir. Erm, Mr. Humphries kneed the jacket.
Mr. Cuthbert Rumbold : Ah! You mean, Mr. Humphries needed the jacket. Let's get our tenses right.
Mr. Humphries : No, no, you don't understand, Sir. You see, I kneed the jacket.
Mr. Cuthbert Rumbold : You need it now?
Mr. Humphries : No, I kneed it then.
Mr. Cuthbert Rumbold : You mean, you needed it then.
Captain Stephen Peacock : If I might clarify the situation, Sir.
Mr. Cuthbert Rumbold : Thank you, Captain Peacock. It does seem to have got rather out of hand.
Captain Stephen Peacock : Yes. It's a matter of spelling, Sir.
Mr. Cuthbert Rumbold : Spelling?
Captain Stephen Peacock : Yes Sir. You spelled kneed with an N. Mr. Humphries was using a K.
Mr. Cuthbert Rumbold : Oh, you mean like kneading dough? Is that it, Mr. Lucas?
Mr. Dick Lucas : Yes, that's it. I needed the dough, but he didn't want the jacket because it was too tight.
Mr. Cuthbert Rumbold : So you kneaded it to make it more supple, which was why you needed the jacket, you may recall Captain Peacock. That is what I said in the first place.
Captain Stephen Peacock : Nearly right, Sir, yes. But what they're trying to explain, Sir, is that, erm... and coming from Hardware, you would not be aware of this, but there is a method used, and I disapprove of it myself, Sir. There is a method used to enlarge the arm holes of jackets, and the method used is to knee the jacket... with a K.
Mr. Cuthbert Rumbold : I am aware of how you spell jacket, Captain Peacock.
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Captain Stephen Peacock : [demonstrating how to knee a jacket to loosen the stitches] Now then, Sir. If you will er, listen carefully. I take the jacket so... and I pull so.
[knees the jacket]
Mr. Cuthbert Rumbold : I can't hear any stitches go.
Mr. Humphries : Perhaps it's already been done.
Captain Stephen Peacock : What makes you say that?
Mr. Humphries : Well, I sold it to you.