- Carl Stevens: [to She Demon] Holy shit... spirit made flesh, huh? Uhm. I'm rich. You seem a woman of means. Let's talk business. With my money, and your, well-uh... hell-spun powers of evil, we could go places, babe. Think about it.
- Iggy: Zombie! Carl's a zombie. No longer a soulless, mindless, walking-dead corporate zombie, but a real zombie.
- Iggy: [as Dana is about to attack the zombie] Wait, wait! Is this a Romero zombie or one of the new virus zombies?
- Alexandra: What the hell are you talking about?
- Dana: Okay, okay, now the old zombies are like, stiff.
- Iggy: They lumber.
- Dana: Whatever!
- Iggy: No, no, not whatever, they lumber, it's important. The new ones are, like, super-fit sport zombies. Old zombies, we can take this guy; new zombies... we may be fucked.
- Dana: [after just escaping into the attic from a small zombie horde] I think we lost them. Where's Alexandra?
- Iggy: They ate her!
- Dana: ...so we're the only ones left?
- Iggy: I think it's just you and me, two mere mortals against evil unknown fighting the preternatural powers of a hell-spawn succubus!
- Dana: F**k her! F**k her and the forces of darkness that created her, f**kin' she-bitch from hell. Hateful, evil murderous bitch with no friends and BAD SKIN!
- [inhales sharply and slaps her bicep]
- Dana: We can DO THIS! What do we have?
- Iggy: For what?
- Dana: ...like weapons to fight off the supernatural forces of darkness?
- Iggy: Nothing.
- Dana: Ughh. Something holy?
- Iggy: Nope.
- Dana: Spells, incantations?
- Iggy: Bupkus.
- Dana: Protective amulets?
- Iggy: Big negatory.
- Dana: There's gotta be some kind of magic charm to command the evil!
- Iggy: I don't know, man.
- Dana: [grabbing Iggy by the collar and shaking him] There's ALWAYS a magic charm to command the evil!
- Iggy: [pauses and points at Dana before calmly saying] That just sounds gay.
- Dana: There's gotta be something. ANYTHING!
- Iggy: We got nothing, man. Nothing.
- [whispers]
- Iggy: Nothing.
- Dana: [looks off as if she has an idea] ... and THAT is the best weapon we have.