Two for the Money (2005)
Jeremy Piven: Jerry
Photos
Quotes
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Jerry : [on tv show] Stats, records, rankings, weather, if the goal post is tilted just a little bit, the Sykes system uses forty two proven indexes, to eliminate the guess work in sports wagering, without my patented computer based picks, you've got a better shot of having God showing up at your door,with nine strippers a bag of pure Bolivan cocaine even viagra to make Chuck's head blow up, than picking these things on your own.
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Jerry : [on the set of Walter's television show] I think I should lead off tonight I got some real strong stuff man
Walter Abrams : You got a good hole, stay in it
Jerry : Come on I went eight for twelve last week I'm hot I'm feeling it
Walter Abrams : You have one good weekend don't get pushy
Jerry : One good weekend? Sykes System revolutionized this industry am I wood?
[Shows a newspaper ad about Brandon]
Jerry : where's my fucking ad?
Walter Abrams : [Grabs the newspaper out of Jerry's hand and slams it down on the table] take a hike
Jerry : What?
Walter Abrams : You're fired you're gone
Jerry : I'm not fired you need me more than ever
Walter Abrams : Get out of here you cut rate parasite
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Jerry : [Bursts into Brandon's office] Do you think New York will win this weekend?
Brandon Lang : [sarcastically] A knock would be nice
Jerry : I'm kind of underwater here, a "yes" or "no" would be great
Brandon Lang : No I don't
Jerry : well, If you know something or if you hear anything you've got to let me know because that's the way we work around here
Brandon Lang : [sarcastically] I'll rush right over, stat
Jerry : I've been working here for six years and you've been here for one
Walter Abrams : [Walter walks into the office, to Jerry] what are you doing in here? Hit the phones and do some damage control rewrite that computer program of yours
Jerry : What can I say? It was a fucked weekend
Walter Abrams : [to Brandon] There's a "fifty dime" bettor on line three and wants to talk to John Anthony
Brandon Lang : What's his name?
Walter Abrams : His name is McCall his a gazillionaire he owns a couple dozen of McDonald franchise restaurants
Jerry : Wait a minute. I landed that lead his my guy
Walter Abrams : "Was" your guy
Jerry : [Referring to Brandon] He's raiding my lists now?
Walter Abrams : Your clients are jumping ship you lactose-intolerant fuck, get out of my sight
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Jerry : [Celebrating Brandon after he won one hundred percent for the games he predicted that weekend] Congratulations Brandon or should I say "John"? Either way it's amazing I'm very impressed, letting salesmen make your picks? That's balls.
Brandon Lang : You better collect some of the winnings right now because the way you're picking you're going to need some for a rainy day.
Jerry : Enjoy it while it lasts, gambling gods, fickle bunch their so easily offended.