- Jonathan Creek: [Referring to the taste used by Adam in the magic act] It's written to be a family show, Adam. You're reducing it to the level of a bank commercial.
- Adam Klaus: Sex and sorcery, Jonathon! Indivisible since the dawn of time!
- Katrina Toplis: [about Hedley] I never met a man like him. He had so many great qualities. Monogamy wasn't one of them.
- Madeline Magellan: [to Jonathon on the phone] You can't begin to imagine the fetid quagmire that passes for my love life.
- Adam Klaus: [to Madeline] That's all magic is! It's an illusion. It doesn't make the illusion magic.
- Jonathan Creek: [to Madeline] I never wanted to be a magician as such - swanning about with a silk handkerchief. It was, I don't know, the ingenuity at the back of it always fascinated the hell out of me.
- Serena Shale: [Looking at the nude painting of a woman being worked on by Hedley] Well, that brings back memmories. Anyone I know?
- Hedley Shale: All from photographs this time. I haven't had a live model in months.
- Serena Shale: You must be losing your touch.
- Adam Klaus: [to Jonathon as he is ogling Francesca] I want to lie beside her in a bath of warm glue!