The Three Stooges (2012)
Ray Collins: Carbunkle
Quotes
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Moe : [the Stooges hitch a ride by hanging on to the rear bumper of Lydia's car, then they get off as they arrive at Teddy's mansion] Hey, do you smell garbage burning?
Moe , Curly , Larry : [the Stooges look down and see that their shoe soles have been worn down and smoking from dragging on the ground; they start rapidly stamping to put out the fumes] Nyah-ah-aah!
Lydia : [gasps] What are you doing here?
Moe : We want the dough-re-mi you owe us, lady.
Curly : Yeah, 830,000 bucks.
Larry : Plus meals.
Carbunkle : May I have a moment, ma'am?
Lydia : Excuse me, gentlemen.
[Lydia goes aside to talk with Carbuncle]
Moe : Mind your P's and Q's.
Curly : But don't forget to dot the I's.
Moe : Certainly.
[Moe finger-pokes Curly in the eyes; Larry chuckles, and puts his hand up sideways to block Moe's eye poke attempt]
Larry : Nyahhh.
[Larry sticks his tongue out at Moe, who hits him on the forehead with his fist]
Larry : Ugh, ooh!
Carbunkle : [to Lydia] I'm afraid I have unfortunate news: I've just received word that Mr. Miosky was struck by a bus.
Lydia : Oh no, so Mac is dead?
Carbunkle : No.
Lydia : No? Are you sure?
Carbunkle : Oh, yes. He's still alive, but he's in bad shape. Your husband is in contact with the hospital. He said he'd call with any news.
Lydia : Thank you, Carbunkle.
[Carbunkle goes back inside]
Larry : Come on blondie, pay up. A deal's a deal!
[Lydia slaps all three Stooges with one stroke]
Lydia : Our deal was that you would get paid when my husband died, and on that count, you have failed miserably.
Moe : You mean he's still kicking?
Lydia : That's right, you idiots. You have ruined my life, now get out of here!
[Lydia knocks all three Stooges over the wall and onto the outside lawn]
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Carbunkle : [checking the guest list] Madam... madam... Sir, madam.
Moe , Larry , Curly : [the Stooges ride up to Teddy's mansion on a skateboard towed by a pack of large, white poodles, the tow rope slips out Moe's hand, and they knock Carbuncle into a flower bed] Nyah-ah-aah!
Carbunkle : Oh no, whoa!
Curly : Ohh, ohh.
Moe : What happened? Now we got to...
Moe : [the Stooges dust themselves off by slapping the dirt off each other's backs; Moe turns around, and Larry accidentally slaps him in the face, Moe grunts] Urgh-urgh-urgh! What's the matter with you? You had the rudder, don't you know how to drive?
Larry : It just went out of control. What kind of poodles are those anyway?
Moe : Standard.
Larry : Well, there's your problem, I can't drive a standard.
[Moe groans at the "standard drive" pun]
Carbunkle : You blithering idiots! What do you think you're doing?
Moe : Out of the way, Threepio, we got to get Teddy.
Carbunkle : [Carbunkle pushes the Stooges, who happen to be in a single-file line, back like dominoes] This is an invitation-only party! Now, good day!
