Quotes
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[as he is being arrested]
Gaspar Voorsboch : I will see you again, man-whore!
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Gaspar Voorsboch : [pointing a Sword at Deuce] You die with the rest of them, Gigolo! Those Gigalos... robbed Me of My Manhood, I was never able to satisfy a Woman, and I shall see to it that they don't either!
[Starts sword fighting with Deuce]
Deuce Bigalow : You don't have to kill anybody, Gaspar, cause You can please a Woman! These Gigalos... don't know what they're talking about!
Chadsworth Buckingham, III : [Watching from the TV outside the Building] Is He talking about us?
Deuce Bigalow : Do You really think that all a Woman wants; is for someone to give Her a mud pretzel, Turkish snow cone, or an Irish facial?
Chadsworth Buckingham, III : Yes they do, liar!
[All the Women nod in disagreement]
Deuce Bigalow : All a Woman really wants; is someone who cares about Her, asks Her about or day, or how She's feeling... or or at least pretends to.
Chadsworth Buckingham, III : [All the Women agree with Deuce] What?
Gaspar Voorsboch : ...or when She's sad...
[Gaspar lunges his sword at Deuce, but misses]
Gaspar Voorsboch : ... cry with Her! Face it, these Gigalos are just ripping Women off!
Chadsworth Buckingham, III : Hey, I'll let You know that I've had absolutely no complaints from any of those freaks!
Lily : [Slaps His Face] I faked it!
Deuce Bigalow : Women don't care if You drive a fancy car, wear a Rolex watch, or have a gigantic schlong like... Heinz Hummer.
Mahmoud : This Guy knows his shit!
Chadsworth Buckingham, III : [All the Gigalos pull out objects that make it look like they have bulges] What are You all doing?... anybody else? *Lil' Kim pulls out a Tootsie roll*
Deuce Bigalow : Let a Woman You know You really care about Her, and maybe She'll give You an Irish facial.
Gaspar Voorsboch : [Knocks the sword out of Deuces hand, pulls out the remote detonator] We die together, Deuce!
Deuce Bigalow : Please sir, You don't have to do this!
Gaspar Voorsboch : They ruined My Life!
Deuce Bigalow : Just give Me the detonator...
Gaspar Voorsboch : No, My penis exploded!
Deuce Bigalow : O.k... that's a tough one, I'll give You that, but having a penis... is overrated, trust Me.
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Gaspar Voorsboch : We will die together, Douche!
Deuce Bigalow : Please, you don't have to do this.
Gaspar Voorsboch : Those Manwhores ruined my life!
Deuce Bigalow : Just give me the detonater.
Gaspar Voorsboch : No, my Penis exploded!
Deuce Bigalow : O.k., that's a tough one, I'll give you that, but... having a Penis, is way over rated, trust me.
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Deuce Bigalow : [on the way to the Man-Whore awards, and Eva is riding behind them] Hey look, there's Eva!
Gaspar Voorsboch : Oh.
[starts speeding up]
Deuce Bigalow : Hey what are you doing, she's right behind us.
Eva : Deuce!
[Deuce peaks his head out the window, and looks back]
Eva : he's the killer!
Deuce Bigalow : Huh, what?
Eva : You're with the killer!
Deuce Bigalow : Uh.. I'm with the dealer?
Eva : He's the Man-Whore killer!
Deuce Bigalow : Um..Eighteen Wheeler?
Eva : [comes right up close to the Passengers Window] My uncle is the killer!
Deuce Bigalow : Oh, I'm with the...
[Turns his attention to Gaspar who points a gun at him]
Deuce Bigalow : ...you're the Killer?
Gaspar Voorsboch : She said: You are with the killer, you stupido!
Deuce Bigalow : Ohhh.
[looks near the back seat, and notices a barely opened hand bag with the Leopard-coat, and a blond wig showing]
Deuce Bigalow : ...but... why, what did Man-Whores ever do to YOU?
Gaspar Voorsboch : What did they do to me? All my life, I wanted to be one thing, a Gigolo, yes, me, Gaspar Voorsboch! I'll never forget that day, it was my first Semester at Man-Whore University.