Calendar Girls (2003)

Penelope Wilton: Ruth

Photos 

Quotes 

• [at the airport] 

  Ruth : Right, everyone. Has everyone got a ticket?

  All : Yes

  Ruth : A passport?

  All : Yes

  Ruth : A lying snake for a husband?

  [everyone looks shocked] 

  Ruth : No? Only me there, then. Let's go. Come on.

• Ruth : Well, I think it's a great idea.

  Cora : You weren't concentrating, were you Ruth?

  Ruth : I was. We're going to raise money to buy a sofa for the hospital in John's name.

  Celia : By posing for a nude calendar!

  Ruth : Oh no!

  Chris : Oh sit down. I'm not asking you to straddle an 'Arley Davidson.

  Celia : It's still a bit of a leap from Burnsall church, love.

  Chris : That's the 'ole point. It's an alternative calendar, it's...

  Annie : It's what John suggested.

  Chris : Did he?

  Annie : The last stage of the flower is the most glorious. So what this calendar would be saying is "actually, yes John, we agree".

  Ruth : With respect, I didn't hear him use the phrase "whip your bras off"

• Eddie Reynoldson : You are looking lovely...

  Ruth : Which one of us are you talking to, Eddie? The one who makes a tart of herself by taking her clothes off or me?

• Marie : Victoria Sponge. Annie's on Victoria sponge.

  [Marie leaves. Chris dives under the table and brings out a cake tin] 

  Ruth : What's that?

  Chris : Well, Annie won't have had time running Yul Brynner in and out of Skipton General, so ta da!

  Annie : Sorry I'm late. It just took a bit longer than... Oh my God, the cake!

  Chris : Told you.

• Cora : I'm surprised they printed it.

  Jessie : It's probably all over the internet by now.

  Annie : By the sound of it, most people have seen it already.

  Chris : Lots of people have photos taken with their tops off on holiday in Ibiza don't they?

  Ruth : It probably just came as a slight shock Chris, what with the previous fifteen photos being of flower arrangements.

• Ruth : We're not all Chrises in this life. Some of us are Ruths.

• Ruth : You two stay and enjoy yourselves. I'm off to Hollywood.

• Chris : Look at 'em. Highgyll WI, "ooh, let's arrange our cakes round an old cartwheel".

  Ruth : Does look pretty though.

  Chris : Whose side are you on, Brutus?

  Ruth : No, I didn't mean...

  Chris : What's your event by the way?

  Ruth : Tea tray, on an international theme. I did Jamaica but it could be anywhere in the Caribbean.

  Chris : You know, if more people did WI, there'd be half the need for hallucinogenic drugs.

• Ruth : Tea tray on an international theme. I did Jamaica but it could be anywhere in the Caribbean.

• W.I. Judge : And the winner of this year's May Wilkinson trophy for Victoria Sponge maximum twelve inch diameter I'm delighted to say is entry number 213.

  Annie : [whispers]  Nice knowing you, Chris.

  Chris : [whispers back]  Help me!

  Ruth : Well that's interesting.

  W.I. Judge : entered by Knapely WI and baked by Chris Harper.

• Chris : Course you've got a body worth looking at.

  Ruth : Just look at that parking.

  Chris : Ruth.

  Ruth : Doesn't it annoy you when people take up two spaces.

• Ruth : Right. Let's do it.