IMDb user comments for
Cold Creek Manor (2003) More at IMDbPro »

Filter:

Best Chronological Prolific Authors Loved It Hated It Hide Spoilers:

Page 1 of 25:

[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11]

Index

243 comments in total

---

43 out of 50 people found the following comment useful :-
Cold Creaky Manor, 21 September 2004
Author: Poseidon-3 from Cincinnati, OH

*** This comment may contain spoilers ***

Many audience members of this thriller were disappointed (mostly thanks to the misleading trailer for the film) because it lacked the supernatural element they thought would be present. They needn't have complained. The film is complete science fiction because not one character in the entire thing remotely behaves like a human being! Quaid and Stone play an NYC couple with high-end careers and two mouthy, spoiled kids who, after one of the children is nearly creamed by an SUV, decide to pack up and move to the country. They find a huge, dilapidated house that is exceedingly reasonable in price (this part of the movie has been done over and over in the cinema from "Burnt Offerings" to "The Watcher in the Woods" et al.) Before they have completely unloaded all the debris from the previous owner (who was foreclosed upon during a jail sentence for manslaughter), the owner (Dorff) shows up and begins to encroach on the desired peacefulness of the family. Quaid hires him to refurbish the swimming pool and before long, Dorff has decided to do almost anything to rid the house of the new owners. The rest of the film deals with the battle of wills between Quaid and his family and Dorff while Quaid seeks to find out why Dorff is so bent on driving them out. Even if Dorff got the family to leave, the property would still not be his legally and he is clearly in no position to buy it back, so even the basic premise of the story lacks solidity. That's the least of the problems, though. Throughout the film, everyone in it acts like a complete idiot. Quaid (in a surprisingly emasculated role, not that that's entirely a bad thing) makes so many stupid decisions at every turn. He does appear handsome and tan in the film, but his character is pretty dim. Stone overacts horrendously. Noted for her cool, chilly roles in films like "Sliver", "Intersection" and "Basic Instinct", here she is a hopelessly edgy bundle of nerves who squeals and screams every time anything unexpected happens like someone coming to the door or coming out of the water and having someone at the edge of the pool! This is apparently a lame attempt to have some "frightening" clips to stick in the trailer so that people wouldn't know that the film is actually a lengthy struggle between a family and a bum and not a haunted house chiller.

Dorff does succeed with the impossible. He creates a character who is unbalanced and threatening and vulgar, yet also sexy and even sympathetic to a point. His is the most interesting work in the film, though his character is pitifully underdeveloped. Other cast members include a well-cast Lewis as a sleazy, boozy tramp, Eskelson as the planet's most useless Sheriff and Plummer, who steals scenes lying down and nearly comatose, as Dorff's craggy, cruel father. Without question, one of the fall-down funniest scenes in the film is meant to be one of the scariest. Ridiculously, each member of the household comes into contact simultaneously with a different terrifying snake (at the precise same time!) They then proceed to bounce through the house like pinballs, screaming at everything and nothing and over emoting to the point of true hilarity as they encounter snake after snake. This scene alone guarantees the film a spot in bad movie heaven. Many other senseless and unintentionally funny moments happen during the "scary" parts. Another horrible aspect of the film is the annoying and inappropriate musical score which, amazingly, was written by the director! He undermines his own film's suspense and tension with such dreadfully bad (and badly timed) music cues. The film is unbelievably illogical and bad in more ways than there is time to detail, but it is watchable, especially if one is in the mood to laugh rather than cower.

---

22 out of 28 people found the following comment useful :-
OK but not that good, 25 February 2005

Author: KP-Nuts from Midlands, England

OK we've all seen this type of film before, family leave problems and life in the city for a new start in the country only to find far greater and real problems than those they left behind.

Unfortunately it's just not done particularly well in this movie. It starts well and gives the impression it will lead into some kind of haunted mansion movie once the family arrive at their new home. However, what happens is far less exciting.

Quaid gives another solid but unremarkable performance, Dorff is passable but his character never seems as threatening as he should be, Lewis plays the kind of role she seems to fit like a glove. The one thing I realised from this film is Sharon Stone has no impact or presence on the screen at all, I mean she had an impact on me when I was 15 and first saw Basic Instinct, but hey. She is one of the few actresses I would actually advise to only accept films with nudity scenes involved.

The direction is only apt, you feel there is meant to be some kind of attraction or sexual tension between Dorff's and Stone's character but whether due to the fault of the Director or actors it does not work at all. It is also at times very predictable, which is not a good factor for a thriller.

The film does have it's redeeming features, it does at least keep you interested enough to follow through to the climax just to see what happens. It is one though you will not be revisiting soon again.

---

39 out of 62 people found the following comment useful :-
Nothing new to see here, move along, 29 January 2005

Author: (roach@eggplant-productions.com) from My Own Head

Cold Creek Manor is just a collection of sad, tired "thriller" clichés. I know it's a bad sign when I'm rooting for the victims to die. Characters say and do things for no reason, apparently, other than the writer wanted to make the movie last just a little bit longer. Rest assured that if a course of action makes no sense or is just a bad idea in general the story will follow it.

As if that weren't bad enough, the characters are all cardboard cut-outs without any depth. Seemingly all the women in this movie are, in the words of Mr. Massie "cheatin' whores." Small town America is once again Hollywoodized into too-close-for-comfort chumminess on the one side and we don't take kindly to strangers xenophobia on the other. Once again the movies tries to impart to us the dangers of moving to the country. Although Quaid's mild-mannered, pushover character works for the most part.

Finally, the sound editing leaves a lot to be desired, lines are muttered requiring the use of subtitles to understand some parts. And the music that is supposed to evoke a sense of suspense just comes across as annoying.

---

22 out of 29 people found the following comment useful :-
Not the sharpest tools in the box, 9 May 2005

Author: alphonsia from Ireland

*** This comment may contain spoilers ***

It's 4:30 a.m. Top executive Mom groans, thumps off the alarm and staggers out of bed. She's got an early morning flight. Respected film-maker Dad mumbles, "Remember to reset the clock." She doesn't, of course.

It's 7:56 a.m. Dad squints at the clock, hollers, "Oh, s**t! Kids, up, up, up, up!," followed by, "We're late. Your mother forgot to reset the alarm. Again!," as he slams together that staple of popular cinema, the breakfast no-one has time to eat.

It's never occurred to either of these Movers and Shakers to buy a second clock. Their alarm-challenged children clatter downstairs, the daughter whining, "Ohmigod, it's late. I have to be at school early today!" Buy an alarm clock, kid. Better yet, read the little book that comes with your beloved mobile phone and see if it has an alarm function.

After hanging Mom for the clock fiasco, Dad decides "the city" is to blame for all their woes. The Green Acres Four treat themselves to an unauthorised viewing of a crumbling country estate that's been foreclosed by the bank. The house is furnished. There's an unmade bed. Yet they roam freely, snooping through family photos and papers.

They buy The Old Massie Place at a knockdown price. Dad's inspired to create one of his "labour of love" documentaries. This consists of "creating a time-line" (i.e., skewering vintage photographs with thumbtacks) and having a goggle at some highly personal Polaroids of the previous owner's wife. Out of "miles" of home movie footage, a poolside scene featuring this attractive young woman and her daughter in bikinis seems to be especially pertinent.

When "Just Out of Jail" Dale Massie shows up looking for work, Dad ignores the protests of his vulnerable teenage daughter and hires the guy for unsupervised work around the house. This is even stupider than the alarm clock situation.

The only vaguely plausible reason Dad could have for inviting this guy into the family home is to help with the documentary. Dale's brimming with family anecdotes ("my grandmother built that pool in 1926"), but Dad acts bored and exasperated when he's around. In a classic scene, Dad's tinkering about on his laptop with archive footage of NYC. Since his budget to too low to hire voice-over talent, his own voice is droning on about cast-iron architecture.

Wielding one of the farm implements Dad doesn't have a clue about, shirtless, sweaty Dale explains that it's a killing hammer, designed by Grandpa Massie and his blacksmith. Articulate, informative and sleazily attractive, he winds up his narrative with, "Look at the spike. Straight into the brain. A small little clean hole right through the skull. Bam! No bone splinters. No pain." Grab your camera, Dad! This is Good Stuff! But no, Dad can't wait for Dale to hightail it out of the house so he can go back to making The Most Boring Documentary in the World. Throw in Dead Meat the Pony and Mobiles Don't Work in the Valley, and you've got all the ingredients for a nice long snooze. Don't forget to set the alarm.

---

26 out of 41 people found the following comment useful :-
Misleading and ill-marketed thriller..., 11 March 2004
Author: MovieAddict2009 from UK

*** This comment may contain spoilers ***

Stupid horror film that was marketed as a supernatural mystery but is rather a dumb mortal tale of two city slickers (Dennis Quaid and Sharon Stone) who take their kids out of New York City after a near-fatal car crash and buy a huge manor in the middle of nowhere.

Unfortunately for them, Dale, the old owner, gets out of prison and comes looking for them, eager to cover up a murderous secret that has been buried inside the house (or around it?) for years.

Dennis Quaid is a documentarian and his wife does nothing but mope about. As he does everything in the house, including making breakfast, she whines that she does too much. Just one of many laughable moments in this straight-to-video-style thriller that boasts a good cast giving watered-down performances.

They knew what they were getting into.

The movie is dumb. This could have made a great supernatural thriller. That's what I thought it was, anyway.

2/5 stars.

- John Ulmer

---

28 out of 45 people found the following comment useful :-
Why, Mike Figgis, why? (1/2*), 19 October 2003

Author: Jason Alley (samurai1978@aol.com) from Sacramento

*** This comment may contain spoilers ***

Otherwise known as "Cape Fear For Dummies", this is a hideously lame "suspense thriller" that is not suspenseful or thrilling. At all.

Dennis Quaid and Sharon Stone play a married couple who decide to move out of the big city after one of their kids is almost hit by a car. So they buy a big, dilapidated mansion in the sticks called "Cold Creek Manor" and start fixing it up. Then, showing tremendous smarts, they hire Dale Massie (Stephen Dorff), the creepy former owner of the house, to help fix it up. Even though they know he just got out of prison, AND the fact that they just found him roaming around in their house. Guess what? He's a psycho!

Since there's really nothing of worth in this movie at all, I'm just going to offer 10 reasons why you SHOULDN'T see "Cold Creek Manor"...

1. It's so predictable and formulaic that to call it by-the-numbers is an insult to numbers.

2. The name of Quaid's character is "Cooper Tilson". What kind of name is "Cooper Tilson"? The kind you'd only find in a movie.

3. You'll get depressed when you realize the same guy who directed the great "Leaving Las Vegas" (Mike Figgis) also directed this piece of crap.

4. The huge amount of plot holes, stupid coincidences, lapses in logic, and crummy dialogue will lead you to believe that the script was written by a 4 year-old.

5. At one point, while playing hide-and-seek, one of the kids finds part of an old wooden sign on the ground that actually says "EVIL" in big letters. Oooooh, scary!

6. When Massie lets loose snakes in the house, they all attack each separate family member at the EXACT SAME TIME. That's convenient.

7. It's boring.

8. It's really, really boring.

9. It's so boring that you'll leave knowing the exact number of lights that go up and down the theater aisle.

10. It sucks.

---

14 out of 18 people found the following comment useful :-
The Cardinal Sin of movies, 6 April 2005

Author: CMUltra (collectormanultra@yahoo.com)

Cold Creek Manor 2003

Ugh.

Slow paced, slow witted. Poorly written. The most interesting character was the bad guy (Stephen Dorff) and he was as cookie-cutter as the rest.

What happened to Dennis Quaid? I'll tell you. He recognized early on that this movie was a dud. His performance throughout ranges from sleepwalking to hysterical over-acting.

Sharon Stone has an excuse. She's not often accused of being a good actress or choosing good movies (though The Quick and the Dead is one of my all time favorites).

It's not that the story has plot-holes. It probably does but the fact that it's so mind-numbingly boring makes that irrelevant.

And that's really the Cardinal Sin of a movie, no? A movie can be bad, yet entertaining (Plan 9 From Outer Space). A movie can be offensive to the point you don't want to watch it, but still well done. A movie can be insulting in it's blatant propaganda, but still maintain interest and create discussion.

This movie is just boring.

---

14 out of 18 people found the following comment useful :-
Amazing how the major league critics can crush a good flick!, 10 April 2004

Author: AlternateViewpoint from Ultima Thule

I've seen way flakier movies that were smash hits. Most Hollywood thrillers & action movies have to be viewed with a willing suspension of disbelief anyhow. People do things they'd never do in real life. They ask stupid questions & accept answers that no one with a high school education and an IQ in even low triple digits would accept in real life. They walk away from falls, car crashes and burning buildings that would kill real human beings. They *split up* to look for the ghost/axe murder/evil demon! So, what's wrong with this one? I got involved. I got tense. I was on the edge of my seat.

I liked it.

The tension was built up without any reference to gory scenes, just creepy camera angles, shadows, the wind blowing curtains, the increasing feeling that Something Really Bad was just around the corner.

You get to see Sharon Stone looking almost like an ordinary human being. Dennis Quaid is his usual edgy self. Stephen Dorff does a great slide into madness.

If I'd believed everything I read about it, I never would've picked up the DVD. It's not Hitchcock, but it's definitely worth watching. Check it out.

---

17 out of 24 people found the following comment useful :-
Another Hollywood Horror/Thriller Miss..., 1 November 2005

Author: ResidentHazard (romerodawn@yahoo.com) from Plymouth, MN

Cold Creek Manor

Here's yet another film that I believe suffered from some poor advertising. Or, at the very least, some misguided advertising. As I recall when it was released, there was a strong vibe to those ads that indicated some sort of haunted house or ghost story or something. So it came up on Encore, I remembered those ads and wanted to see what kind of haunted house story I was going to get. Dennis Quaid and Sharon Stone? Sounds alright. I'm not generally a big fan of haunted house pictures, but I figured I'd give it a look. At least it's rated R, right?

Well, well, well... So. So where are the ghosts and sh*t? Turns out this is not the ghost story I thought it was... A big, rich family from "the big city" (I think it was Boston or New York--of course--everyone's from either those cities or LA these days) gets fed up with the hustle and bustle and insanity of living in the city and decide to move out to the middle of nowhere. They stumble upon a glorious old house in glorious old decay--Cold Creek Manor. The house is owned by a bank ready to off-load it for whatever they can get for it. Apparently, they could get around 200 grand for it. Sh*t, this house is huge! The property goes on forever! There are houses in the Twin Cities here that are 1/6th as big as the house in this film that cost more than that! Anyway, eventually, the last surviving, capable, member of the family that once lived there turns up, fresh from prison, and a little annoyed that his house is all gone. So he starts terrorizing the family all slowly and methodically and weirdly... Or does this family just have some really rotten luck...? Well, at any rate, Dennis Quaid thinks the guy is out to get them and goes mildly berserk trying to prove it. He's a documentary filmmaker, and it doesn't help matters that he's doing his current documentary on the family that lived in that big ol' mansion before he and his family moved in.

Here's the breakdown:

The Good:

--The acting is generally pretty good (one scene I'll point out later is the exception)

--Dennis Quaid and Sharon Stone after all. She's done well to prove she's more than just a remarkable specimen of femininity--she's also an actress, after all.

--Impressive sets--that house is beautiful--from the decaying look of it's years of neglect to it's remarkable half-restoration--it's a great lookin' place to live.

--Fairly interesting story.

--Pretty good chemistry between Sharon Stone and Dennis Quaid, they're characters (the married couple) endure arguments and crumbling marriage with hints of adultery.

Didn't Hurt It, Didn't Help:

--The atmosphere was pretty mild. Nothing special, and nothing doing a really intriguing job of building tension.

--The usual plot-point that one part of the mystery can only be solved by a chance discovery by the children is, of course, present here too.

--Average Cinematography.

--Some very mild blood/gore scenes. Mostly, with just some blood--and a skeleton or two. Nothing major. Looked good, but wasn't anything special.

--Only mild violence. Fight scenes, mostly.

--Very mild nudity, and one sex scene--through window blinds no less. The nudity is pretty much relegated to pictures--photographs--of the wife of the last member of Cold Creek's original family.

The Bad:

--Sharon Stone kept her clothes on. Okay, I'm kidding. She did, but that didn't hurt the film in any way.

--The music varies from average, to simply obnoxious. We get scenes that contain mild drama, but have a piano pounded on with a feverish, near lunatic intensity. Here's an example: Car driving down stretch of road, someone's worried about an argument--overcast with DUNN-DUNN-DUNN-DUNN-DUNN-DUNN-DUNNNNN!!!! as loud as the howling of hell beasts in hell.

--One exceptionally poor scene where the family is apparently threatened by generally harmless American mountain snakes. The snakes slowly slither to and fro through the house and everybody freaks out with enough overacting to match any Keanu Reeves scene. It just wasn't scary. Not at all. Maybe, if there were tons and tons of snakes--like in "Raiders of the Lost Ark" it would've been mildly scary. But whole family is running away from a terrifying torrent of roughly 6 snakes. The scene, very simply, wasn't believable. I almost laughed at it--it was that stupid.

--Some clichés and cheesiness pop up occasionally. No real surprises.

The Ugly:

--Occasionally feels like a "Deliverance"-style "big city folks out 'n their element" movie--but not as good as "Deliverance" (which is a classic).

Memorable Scene:

--Dennis Quaid punches Sharon Stone in the face. Oopsy!

Acting: 7/10 (except for that one scene) Story: 6/10 Atmosphere: 5/10 Cinematography: 5/10 Character Development: 7/10 Special Effects/Make-up: 7/10 (not much to note) Nudity/Sexuality: 2/10 (quantity) Violence/Gore: 6/10 Sets/Backgrounds: 8/10 Dialogue: 7/10 Music: 3/10 Writing: 6/10 Direction: 6/10

Cheesiness: 3/10 Crappiness: 0/10

Overall: 5/10

I'm giving it a 5 because the film suffers from a few too many problems. It's probably good for fans of horror/thrillers to take a look at, but is likely too mild for hardcore horror fanatics to care about. Better, maybe, for the average movie-goer looking for a light thriller to spend an evening with.

www.ResidentHazard.com

---

10 out of 12 people found the following comment useful :-
Cold Creek Morons (Spoilers Abound), 15 September 2005

Author: TheSnerd from United States

*** This comment may contain spoilers ***

It came on whatever damned channel I had the TV on and I decided to start watching it. Sadly, no amount of therapy will be able to correct that grievous error on my part.

I am still awake, desperately trying to find a way to rationalize that complete waste of 2 hours and 5 minutes of my life. I think I would have felt better about all of this if someone had put a gun to my head and forced me to watch this tripe. Of course, I would have opted for the bullet, but I think my captor would have ended their own life before they got around to putting me out of my misery. This is to be a warning to anyone else who may accidentally watch it.

DON'T DO IT!

here there be spoilers

Actually...the whole movie is a damned spoiler. Nothing is a surprise. OK, one scene is a surprise. The whole family gets surprised by snakes, at the same time, in different rooms of this huge mansion. Now, if this had been the supernatural thriller that the trailers had led you to believe it was, this would be OK. THIS ISN'T A SUPERNATURAL THRILLER! It's about a psycho redneck that had already slaughtered his family and decided that he didn't want the evil city folk to live in "his" house. That psycho redneck planted the snakes in the house, at least, a few hours before the crazed snake attack!

The snakes must have all worn synchronized watches and planned this thing out. The snakes also must have flew in some snake friends from other countries because many of them aren't from around here, boy. THOSE WACKY SNAKES! The scene was supposed to be scary. It was pure comic gold. Another reviewer mentions something about Dennis Quaid screaming like a little girl. The thing I love the most, is the fact that they all ran to the roof instead of out the front door. Why?

There are too many ludicrous scenes to break down for you, so I'll skip to the end. The climactic battle that leads to the "city folk" killing the evil redneck is so effing ridiculous... GAH! My brain crawled out of my head and slapped me around until the credits quit rolling. My brain was BULLS**T over that nonsense. I can't even describe it.

To hell with it. I'll try anyway. Basically, Bumpkin Boy was all set to cave in the skulls of the Evil City People, hammer styles, when suddenly,they trapped him with a rope! It wasn't even around his neck. He had more room than the three of them, combined, to get out of it. Hell, you could tell that he was HOLDING ON TO THE ROPE TO KEEP FROM SLIPPING OUT.

It was at that point that my brain started beating the snot out of the rest of me.

They didn't even strangle him to death. They took some time to nod at each other and proceeded to scream "GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!" as they broke the glass and...

Oh hell. I can't even type the ending. My brain just found a knife. It's had enough.

I still don't think I am properly conveying the true level of "suck" that this movie possesses. I'll try it with a visual:

>>>>>>>--------<<<<<<<<

See that? That has more depth than Cold Creek Manor.

It is a demon film.

If you want to experience Cold Creek Manor without having the displeasure of watching it, you could always stare at a blade of grass whilst slapping yourself in the face with a bag of wet mice for 2 hours and 5 minutes. No matter what you do, it will still be better than Cold Creek Manor was.

Don't see it. Not even the synchronized snake attack scene is worth it.

---

---

Page 1 of 25:

[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11]

Add another comment

---

Related Links

Plot summary	Ratings	Awards
Newsgroup reviews	External reviews	Parents Guide
Official site	Plot keywords	Main details
Your user comments	Your vote history