Sinderella Live (1995 Video)

Charlie Drake: Baron Hardon

Quotes 

• PC Lifelike : When do you overtake on the left?

  Baron Hardon : [shouting]  WHEN THE BASTARD IN FRONT WON'T MOVE OVER!

• PC Lifelike : How do you overcome drowsiness while driving on the motorway?

  Baron Hardon : You finger... You finger the hitch-hiker!

  [after a very awkward pause] 

  Buttons : He didn't read any of his bloody script! You *fondle* the hitch-hiker! *Fondle*!

  Baron Hardon : [doing hand actions]  You fondle, I fucking finger!

  [Everyone else laughs; Baron Hardon then licks his finger] 

  Buttons , Fairy Godmother , PC Lifelike : [in disgust]  OH!

• [Baron Hardon tries to put the glass slipper on Madonna's foot, but it barely rests on her toes] 

  Madonna : It fits! It fits!

  Baron Hardon : What are you talking about?

  Madonna : My foot fits into the crystal slipper!

  Baron Hardon : That foot wouldn't fit into the Crystal Fucking Palace!

• Baron Hardon : [randomly singing about a gnu]  I'm a guh-nu! / I shit on my shoe!