The Guru (2002)

Emil Marwa: Vijay Rao

Quotes 

• Vijay : Name one famous Indian in America.

  Sanjay : That guy from the Simpsons.

  Vijay : He is a cartoon!

• Vijay : Do you know why they call it the American Dream? Because it only happens when you are asleep.

• Vijay : [shouting while knockin at the door of his roomates]  IMMIGRATION!

• Vijay : You have a roof over your head, clothes on your back, food in your belly, what more do you want?

  Ramu Gupta : I want what you promised.

• Chantal : I give you Swami Bu.

  Vijay : Swami, you're on.

  [a drunk Swami collapses] 

  Vijay : Swami Bu has gone to another dimension.

• Ramu Gupta : [walks into the apartment, and Sanjay and Vijay are watching a porno with Sharonna in it]  What are you watching?

  Vijay : [makes a sex motion]  M-M-M-M-My Sharonna. Mmm, Mmm, Mmm, Mmm, Mmm.

  Ramu Gupta : YOU BASTARDS! TURN IT OFF!

  [jumps on Sanjay] 

  Sanjay : You've never seen Good Will Hunting?

  Vijay : We also have Star Wars, Episode 69.

• Ramu Gupta : Is the Mercedes in the shop or something?

  Vijay : Or something.