Fri, Nov 26, 1999
Despite standing in line for six hours, Bram failed to get England-Holland cup match tickets, so the Swift Boys ask the chairman a meeting with a black market trader, but they turn his offer down when hearing Wim's wife Anja has won six VIP tickets in a radio contest. Alas she intends to take only gay Filip and four 'other' soccer wives, causing the boys to try flattery, soccer quizzes and fury, all in vain: Wim has to apologize and pay double again, then bid against their own chairman which ups the price to 1,0OO guilders, a dirty trick. Wim gives the girls a ride but switches the tickets, yet the boys get a cold shower and manage to make it even worse...
Tue, Sep 25, 2001
The team has found a new player, Berrie, a driving instructor with a heavy southern accent and laid-down mentality. The chairman eagerly installs a notice for his private parking spot, which is cheerfully ignored by the players, but also by a posh outsider, Barrie Mens, chairman of an exclusive golf club which is moving into the neighboring land, but crushes his foot to make the 'suit' move his superior car. The Swift Boys are startled to find a soccer league program got the Poldervogels to anglicize their name into Lowland Birds and turn sissy. The chairman first enlists the boys to chase the golfers, cursing when they seem to fraternize instead, but by the time they're brushed off Nadja has changed his mind, as rich neighbors spell rich pickings...
Wed, Dec 13, 2000
Willem's death leaves the Swift Boys depressed. Bram insists they should play a prominent part in the funeral, but no-one has practical ideas or dares speech. So the club president is bribed with 'backward' member contributions, but gets drunk practicing an anyway impersonal eulogy. Bram is puzzled about Willems' last will mentioning 'best friend Bullie', but recalls after a most embarrassing service, where a speaker from the bitter rival team Poldervogels saves the day.
Tue, Dec 4, 2001
One of the Swiftboys' Sunday football pleasures is verbally abusing the referee, but this time a member of the Dutch Soccer League's disciplinary committee actually takes offense to their reported use of terms like son of a whore and blind queer, so - he has a blind, gay twit delivered by his ma, a cheap hooker, for their next match against nice farm-boys. No harm is done although the entire game happens literally behind the ref's back, except by him, he literally gets lost, in the mote and caught in a net. Antillian Paul, who was ridiculed ruthlessly by the mates for his temporary spectacles, takes polite pity of the bumbler, but is horrified to find it's also a blatant racist, but his sneaky 'revenge' in kind goes wrong... The chairman finally sends the dodo off the field, but then ma arrives, with an embarrassing memory for faces...