[
to a princess at lunch]
Queen Victoria:
You're not eating enough. One must not let vanity overrule appetite.
Queen Victoria:
No one should think themselves wiser than me!
[
the Prince of Wales has just had a rather cryptic conversation with Disraeli]
Lord Stanley:
What did he want?
Mary Ann Disraeli:
To know when he'll be king.
Mary Ann Disraeli:
[
to Stanley] Gossip counts!
Mary Ann Disraeli:
[
to the Prince of Wales] I never listen to gossip.
Queen Victoria:
[
Queen spills water down her front]
John Brown:
Honest to God woman, I never thought I'd see you in such a state, you must miss him dreadfully.
Queen Victoria:
You do not! - he- Get him out!
[
heads towards door]
Queen Victoria:
GET HIM OUT! GET HIM OUT!
Prime Minister Benjamin Disraeli:
[
Inside a horse-drawn carriage traveling across a huge Highland landscape] Yesterday, Gladstone talked for three hours on the Irish Church Bill... I am as guilty as the rest of underestimating his reforming zeal. Tory days may be numbered, but I fancy there yet remains one last hope of deliverance. Wheresoever the blame lies, we must now close ranks and defend Mrs Brown's England. As for my interminable journey to the land of Calvin, oatcakes and sulphur...
[
arrives at Balmoral]
Prime Minister Benjamin Disraeli:
no Prime Minister made greater sacrifice than attempting to run the country six hundred miles north of civilization.
Queen Victoria:
[
to Prime Minister Disraeli] How dare the Irish break with the Anglicans? If Albert were alive today he would never allow the Crown to give up Church patronage. No, the Irish must be told, very firmly, to stay exactly where they are. It is the thin edge of the wedge, Mr Disraeli. Next, you will be telling me that the Crown no longer governs this nation.
[
reporters and photographers are hiding, trying to get clandestine photos of the Queen and Brown. Brown smells a rat and goes off to investigate]
Journalist:
Where'd he go?
John Brown:
[
appearing right next to them] THIS CLOSE ENOUGH FOR YOU BOYS?
John Brown:
You tell *Her Majesty* that if her husband were here he'd tell her to get out of the house and get some air into her lungs.
John Brown:
We were due in at 1.15. You're late.
John Brown:
All I wanted to tell her was how I feel for God's sake!
Archie Brown:
You don't tell Her Majesty how you feel
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