The First Wives Club (1996)

Sarah Jessica Parker: Shelly Stewart

Photos 

Quotes 

• Morty : Shelly, what happened here? $140,00 for a PLATE? $47,000 for a carpet? A USED carpet? $300,00 for a Lamborghini? Are you crazy?

  Shelly : I bought the car for you! It was only 300 grand! It was a GIFT!

  Morty : With my money you bought it! I bought me the gift!

  Shelly : Jesus, Morty, all I want is a lifestyle, y'know - with some ambiance and some classic eternal good taste!

• Bill : Nice car, used to have one myself.

  Shelly : Thanks. So, what's going on in there? Is it just a lot of battered women dancing around or what?

  Bill : Yeah, sort of. Not really my scene.

  Shelly : Me neither.

  Bill : So, are you here with anybody?

  Shelly : Not really.

  Bill : How old are you?

• Brenda : Morty! Well, look at you. You look prosperous.

  Morty : Brenda, don't embarrass me.

  Brenda : [Mocking Morty]  Don't embarrass you.

  Morty : Don't make a scene.

  Brenda : Don't make a scene.

  Morty : Do not make a scene.

  Brenda : Don't embarrass you! You've got a *nerve*! I'll tell you what's embarrassing!

  Morty : Keep your voice down.

  Brenda : Being hassled by Mr. Zaworsky... because I'm behind in the rent, *that's* embarrassing. Worrying about how I'm gonna get my kid through college, *that's* embarrassing!

  Morty : You know something? You *never* listen. For twenty years you never ever listened. Here,

  [grabs a yellow blouse] 

  Morty : honey why don't you try this one in a fitting room, looks very nice on you.

  Brenda : You know, I could use this. It's very beautiful and I love the color. But what am I gonna to use for money? HOW AM I GONNA PAY FOR IT?

  Morty : It's the *company* that is expanding. Don't you understand that? The *company*, not *me*! I'm a mere laborer!

  Brenda : You're a liar and a FRAUD!

  Morty : I have no money.

  Brenda : Really? Why don't you look in your purse?

  Morty : Oh you're very funny.

  Shelly : There stunning Morton, I need all of them.

  Brenda : Morton?

  Shelly : [covers her face with a dress]  Oh God, make it go away.

  Brenda : Shelly! Look at you! My my, the bulimia certainly has paid off.

  Morty : Don't start.

  Brenda : What's a matter Morty? Can't you buy her a whole dress?

  Shelly : Brenda, why don't you try these on in

  [holds out her arms] 

  Shelly : *your size*!

  Morty : It's really a delight running into you today Brenda.

• Shelly : [of her salad dressing]  Normally I bring my own. You know that fat free ranch stuff. But this, this is restaurant quality.

• Shelly : Gunilla Garson Goldberg, personally inviting me to one of her super-social luncheons!

  Morty : Why?

• Shelly : Brenda, why don't you try on one of these in *your size*?