Hot Shots! Part Deux (1993)

Charlie Sheen: Topper Harley

Photos 

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Quotes 

• Topper Harley : [narrating]  Somebody once wrote, "Hell is the impossibility of reason." Well, that's what this place feels like - hell. I hate it already and it's only been a few hours. I'm so tired. We get up at four in the morning...

  Capt. Benjamin L. Willard : [narrating]  At first I thought they handed me the wrong dossier. I couldn't believe they wanted this man dead. Third Generation West Point, top of his class, Airbourne, Korea, about a thousand decorations, etc, etc...

  Topper Harley , Capt. Benjamin L. Willard : [as their boats pass each other]  I loved you in Wall Street!

• Topper Harley : These men have taken a supreme vow of celibacy, like their fathers, and their fathers before them...

• Rabinowitz : What are you reading?

  Topper Harley : Great Expectations.

  Rabinowitz : Is it any good?

  Topper Harley : It's not what I'd hoped for.

• Topper Harley : Colonel, who are they?

  Col. Denton Walters : She's CIA. The other man's an extra.

• Topper Harley : Ramada, I want to be with you. I want to hold you. I want to meet your parents and pet your dog...

  Ramada Rodham Hayman : My parents are dead, Topper. My dog ate them.

• Topper Harley : I'm not saying I don't trust you, and I'm not saying I do. But I don't.

• Topper Harley : You're the only one that knows how to get to the copter pad. If I'm not there in 15 minutes, you know what to do.

  Col. Denton Walters : Yeah, we get the hell out of here!

  Topper Harley : No! Wait another 15 minutes!

• Topper Harley : President Benson.

  President Thomas 'Tug' Benson : No you're not. I've seen him on TV. An older man, about my height.

  Michelle Huddleson : Mr. President, this is Topper Harley.

  President Thomas 'Tug' Benson : Topper Harley, of course, the son I never had. No wonder I didn't recognize you then.

• [Dexter is being rescued] 

  Dexter : You don't understand. I can't walk... they've tied my shoelaces together.

  Topper Harley : A knot. Bastards!

• Ramada Rodham Hayman : Topper, I was so young, just a schoolgirl. He was an older man, so wise in the ways of the world. He used to come around the schoolyard, day after day. I so admired his persistence. Even the restraining order my parents slapped on him was no deterrent. He opened my eyes to the arts: music, clog-dancing, WrestleMania. His work has meant so much to so many. And I owe him everything, Topper. Everything.

  Topper Harley : I'm happy for you, kid. But if you think you can hurt me again, you're wrong. I left my heart in my other pants.

• Topper Harley : President Benson?

  Tug Benson : No, you're not. He's an older fella, about my height.

• Ramada Rodham Hayman : Dexter is one of the captives. He's my husband.

  Topper Harley : You've got to be joking.

  Ramada Rodham Hayman : If I was joking, I would say: "A rabbi, a priest and a minister walk into a bar..."

  Topper Harley : Okay, okay, he is your husband.

• Topper Harley : Of all the missions in all the jungles you had to walk into this one.

• Topper Harley : I'm putty in your hands.

  Michelle Huddleson : In my hands, nothing turns to putty.

• Topper Harley : We both know you belong with Dexter. You're part of his work, the thing that keeps him going. I'm no good at being noble, but... do you have any idea what would happen if you stay here with me?

  Ramada Rodham Hayman : Of course I do. Sex. Wild, free, passionate, unbridled sex. I would fondle you in ways you can't imagine. I would pleasure you at any time, in any place, in any way, for as long as you could possibly desire.

• Topper Harley : [after Ramada has been shot]  For a moment there, I thought you were...

  Ramada Rodham Hayman : Gabriella Sabatini? I get that all the time. It must be the nose.

• Ramada Rodham Hayman : I'm married. I was married before you and I ever met. I'm still married today.

  Topper Harley : You're joking.

  Ramada Rodham Hayman : I'm not.

  Topper Harley : You've got to be.

  Ramada Rodham Hayman : If I was joking, I would say: "A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, 'Why the long face?'"

  Topper Harley : You are married.

• Topper Harley : Ramada, I do love you. I've tried to forget you but no matter what, your face is on the tip of my tongue.

• Col. Denton Walters : It seems there were three bears. And one morning when their porridge was too hot, they went for a walk. And a little blond girl came skipping through the woods... she ate their porridge and she sat in their chairs... she slept in their beds. And when those bears returned and discovered that mess... Do you know what happened then Topper?

  Topper Harley : No.

  Col. Denton Walters : That little blond girl get scared. Ran away.

  Topper Harley : So you're saying is that little blond girl is me. If this is about me coloring my hair...

• Topper Harley : [glances at Michelle and Asian man]  Who are they?

  Col. Denton Walters : She's CIA. That man's an extra.

• Topper Harley : [dazed]  That's right, Cindy. It's twenty three minutes past the hour, and now heres the Buckinghams with "Kind of a Drag"...

  [Topper collapses] 

• Topper Harley : Do you know what its like to have your heart shot out of season and tied to the top of a car? How it feels to be passed like the world's largest kidney stone? Ramada... I don't THINK so.

• Topper Harley : Harbinger. I was right, wasn't I? You sabotaged all of the other missions. I find that totally unacceptable.

  Harbinger : [Sobbing]  You got me wrong. All this shooting and killing. I can't go on.

  [Begins to cry] 

  Topper Harley : Hey, hey rainy face. Let the sun come out, you bad G.I. Joe. Here why don't you give uncle Topper a nice, big blow.

  Harbinger : [Blows into Topper's handkerchief]  I'm done.

  Topper Harley : Atta boy.

  [the handkerchief is a bag of snot, and drops it, and hands Harbinger gun and shoots a few Iraqis] 

  Harbinger : Thank you, Topper. I can kill again, you've given me another reason to live.

  Topper Harley : Head towards the gate, they'll be plenty of bad guys to shoot along the way.

• Topper Harley : [Dexter has fallen off a cliff and died]  He really was a wiener.

• Topper Harley : There is also something not right. Harbinger, where were you went the boat showed up?

  Harbinger : What are you accusing me of?

  Topper Harley : Nothing, yet. But, I want to you know, I smell a rat.

  [Then, a rat appears on Topper's back] 

  Harbinger : Hey, when you were showing off, I was cutting teeth for some of the best commanders.

  Topper Harley : Listen, I'm not saying I don't trust you and I'm not saying I do, but I don't.