Aladdin (1992)
Gilbert Gottfried: Iago
Photos
Quotes
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[when Gazeem tries to steal the lamp from the Cave of Wonders, the latter swallows him whole]
Iago : I can't believe it! I just don't believe it! We're never gonna get ahold of that stupid lamp! Just forget it! Look at this. Look at this. I'm so ticked off that I'm molting.
Jafar : Patience, Iago, patience. Gazeem was obviously less than worthy.
Iago : Oh, there's a big surprise! That's an incredib... I think I'm gonna have a heart attack and die from that surprise! What are we gonna do? We got a big problem here, a big... Mmph!
[Jafar grabs Iago's beak to shut him up]
Jafar : Yes. Only one may enter. I must find this one, this... diamond in the rough.
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["Snake" Jafar has Aladdin in a tight squeeze]
Jafar : You little fool. You thought you could defeat the most powerful being on Earth.
Iago : Squeeze him, Jafar. Squeeze him like a- Awk!
[Genie elbows Iago and knocks him into the air]
Jafar : Without the Genie, boy, you're nothing.
Aladdin : The Genie... The Genie! The Genie has more power than you'll ever have!
Jafar : What?
Aladdin : He gave you your power. He can take it away.
Genie : [smiling uncomfortably] Al, what're you doing? Why are you bringing me into this?
Aladdin : Face it, Jafar. You're still just second best!
Jafar : [slightly shocked] You're right. His power does exceed my own. But not for long.
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[Aladdin has tricked Jafar into wishing to be a more powerful genie than Genie]
Jafar : The universe is mine to command! To control!
Aladdin : Not so fast, Jafar! Aren't you forgetting something?
Jafar : Huh?
Aladdin : You wanted to be a genie? You got it!
[cufflinks form on Jafar's wrists]
Jafar : What?
Aladdin : And everything that goes with it.
[Aladdin holds up a black genie lamp, which sucks Jafar in]
Jafar : No! No!
Iago : I'm getting out of here!
Aladdin : Phenomenal cosmic powers...
[Iago tries to flee, but Jafar grabs him]
Iago : Come on, you're the genie. I don't want, I don't...!
[both Jafar and Iago disappear in the lamp]
Aladdin : ...itty bitty living space.
Genie : Al, you little genius, you!
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Princess Jasmine : [to Jafar] At least some good will come of my being forced to marry. When I am Queen, I will have the power to get rid of you.
Sultan : Well, now. That's nice. All settled then. Now, Jasmine, getting back to this suitor business. Jasmine? Jasmine!
[the Sultan notices that Jasmine is running out of the room, and runs after her]
Jafar : [scowls in their direction] If only I had gotten that lamp!
Iago : [mocking Jasmine] "I will have the power to get rid of you." Dahhh! To think we gotta keep kissing up to that chump, and his chump daughter, for the rest of our lives.
Jafar : No, Iago. Only until she finds a chump husband. Then she'll have us banished. Or beheaded.
Iago : Oh, wait a minute, wait a minute! Jafar, what if you were the chump husband?
Jafar : What?
Iago : Okay, okay. You marry the princess, all right? And and, uh, you. Then you become the sultan!
Jafar : Marry the shrew. I become sultan. The idea has merit.
Iago : Yes, merit. Yes! And then, we drop papa-in-law and the little woman off a cliff.
[he dives off Jafar's staff headfirst, then hits the ground]
Iago : "Yah. Ker-splat!"
Jafar : [laughs] I love the way your foul little mind works!
[both laugh evilly]
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Iago : I can't believe it, I just don't believe it! We're never gonna get a hold of that stupid lamp! Just forget it! Look at this - look at this, I'm so ticked off that I'm molting!
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Iago : We gotta get outta here! We gotta get out! I gotta start packing, Your Highness! Only essentials, we gotta travel light. Bring the guns, the weapons, the knives...
[suddenly comes across a photo of himself and Jafar as he is rummaging through his possessions]
Iago : And, uh, how about this picture? I don't know, I think I'm making a weird face in it.
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Iago : Oh, nice shot, Jaf...
[Abu whacks him over the head, and Iago passes out]
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Sultan : It's this suitor business. Jasmine refuses to choose a husband. I'm at my wits' end.
Iago : Awk! Wits' end!
Sultan : Oh.
[laughs and pulls out a cracker]
Sultan : Have a cracker, pretty Polly.
[Iago gasps and shakes his head. Sultan stuffs the cracker into Iago's mouth]
Jafar : [laughs as Iago chokes] Your Majesty certainly has a way with dumb animals.
[Iago gives Jafar an angry look]
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Iago : Ladies and gentlemen, a warm Agrabah welcome for Sorcerer Jafar!
Jafar : Now where were we? Ah, yes abject humiliation!
[He zaps Jasmine and Sultan with his staff, and they both bow to him. Rajah comes running at him]
Jafar : Down, boy!
[He zaps Rajah, and the tiger turns into a kitten. Rajah meows]
Jafar : Oh princess
[lifts Jasmine's chin with his staff]
Jafar : there's someone I'm dying to introduce you to.
Aladdin : [Flying towards him on Carpet] Jafar! Get your hands off her!
Jafar : [zaps Aladdin, Carpet flies away. Singing] Prince Ali, yes, it is he, but not as you know him. Read my lips and come to grips with reality.
Jafar : Yes, meet a blast from your past. Whose lies were too good to last! Say hello to your precious Prince Ali!
[zaps Ali back to Aladdin as he says it]
Iago : [mockingly] Or should we say Aladdin?
Princess Jasmine : [shocked gasp] Ali?
Aladdin : Jasmine, I tried to tell you. I just.
Jafar : [still singing] So Ali turns out to be merely Aladdin.
Jafar : Just a con, need I go on? Take it from me, his personality flaws, give me adequate cause,
[sends Aladdin and Abu in a pillar, Carpet flies in after them]
Jafar : to send him packing on a one way trip so his prospects take a terminal dip, his assets frozen, the venue chosen, is the ends of the earth.
Jafar : [sends the pillar in the air]
[Spoken]
Jafar : Whoopee! So long!
Iago : Goodbye. See ya.
Jafar : [sings] Ex-Prince Ali!
[laughs maniacally]
Aladdin : Abu? Abu! Oh, this is all my fault. I should have freed the Genie when I had the chance.
Aladdin : Abu! Are you okay?
Abu the Monkey : [shivers] Uh-huh.
Aladdin : I'm sorry, Abu. I made a mess of everything, somehow. I gotta go back and set things right. Yeah! All right! Now, back to Agrabah! Let's go!
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Iago : I can't take it anymore! If I gotta choke down on one more of those moldy, disgusting crackers. Bam! Whack!
Jafar : Calm yourself, Iago.
Iago : And then I'd grab him around the head. Whack, whack!
Jafar : Soon I will be sultan, not that addlepated twit.
Iago : And then I stuff the crackers down his throat. Ha ha.
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Princess Jasmine : [Jafar opens the door to his lab, making sure first that no one is looking, then sneaks out, though while he's doing this, Jasmine spots him] Jafar?
Jafar : [Quickly covers the entrance] Oh... Princess.
Iago : [Casually walks through the doorway, but Jafar slams the door, crushing Iago] Jafar - I'm stuck...
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Jafar : [Genie's power transforms "Snake" Jafer into a "Genie" Jafer] Ye-eeee-es-ssss.
[the snake that surrounds the tighted Aladdin dissolves into dust, as Jasmine's hand buried by the sand of the hourglass]
Jafar : Y-eeee-es-ssss! The power.
["Genie" Jafer chuckles as Aladdin breaks the hourglass to save Jasmine]
Jafar : [o.s] The absolute,
Jafar : [breaks the roof of the palace] power!
Princess Jasmine : What have you done?
Aladdin : Trust me.
Jafar : [the power of "Genie Jafer" creates The Black Lamp] The universe is mind to command, to control!
Aladdin : Not so fast, Jafer. Aren't you forgetting something?
Jafar : Huh?
Aladdin : You wanted to be a genie? You got it!
Jafar : [the gold sheckles forms around his arms] What?
Aladdin : And everything that goes with it.
Jafar : [Aladdin uses the lamp to suck up "Genie" Jafer] No-oooo! No-oooo!
Iago : I'm getting out of there.
Jafar : [screaming overlapping; as he grabs Iago] No-oooo...!
Aladdin : [o.s] Phenomenal cosmic Powers.
Iago : Come on, you're the genie. I don't want... I- I don't want...
["Genie" Jafer and Iago has sucked up together in the lamp]
Aladdin : Itty-bitty living space.
Genie : Al -l... you little genius, you.
[Abu, the Magic Carpet, Jasmine, the Sultan and Rajah restored back to their usual themselves, along with the palace]
Jafar : [inside the lamp] Get your blasted beak out of my face.
Iago : [inside lamp] Oh, shut up, you moron.
Jafar : Don't tell me to shut up.
Genie : [as Jafer & Iago's argument continues inside the lamp, Aladdin hands the lamp to the Genie] Allow me. Ten-thousand years in a Cave of Wonders ought to chill him out.
[the Genie pricks the lamp into the desert]
Jafar : Shut,
Jafar : u-uuuu-uuuu-p...
[the purple lights flashes from the beyond the desert]
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[Jafar has used his magic to turn the Sultan into a living marionette and Iago is taking his revenge]
Iago : Puppet ruler want a cracker? Here! Here's your cracker! Shove 'em all the way down your throat! Here, have lots of crackers!
[Jasmine is chained and dressed as a slave girl]
Princess Jasmine : [as Jafar chuckles maliciously] Stop it! Jafar, leave him alone.
[Jafar motions Iago to stop. Iago hesitates, then gives one last shove]
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Princess Jasmine : Father, I choose Prince Ali.
Jafar : Prince Ali left.
Aladdin : Better check your crystal ball again, Jafar!
Princess Jasmine : Prince Ali!
Iago : How in the he-
[covers his mouth]
Iago : Awk!
