My Mom's a Werewolf (1989)

Tina Caspary: Jennifer Shaber

Quotes 

• Stacey Pubah : [on the phone]  Jennifer, we got a big problem.

  Jennifer Shaber : What is it?

  Stacey Pubah : Fangoria issue number 43, October 1978. Unless a formal exorcism is performed on the deceased werewolf, the one who killed it will transform within 24 hours of the slaying.

  Jennifer Shaber : Good Night, Stacey.

  Stacey Pubah : No, Jennifer No.

  [Jennifer hangs up the phone and yawns, revealing her werewolf teeth] 

• Jennifer Shaber : Help me, my mom's a werewolf.

  Stacey Pubah : You come barging in here and interrupt what might've been the most important phone call in my life and tell me that your mom's a werewolf?

  Jennifer Shaber : I mean my mother's a real honest-to-goodness werewolf.

  Stacey Pubah : Big deal, my mother's a cow.

  Jennifer Shaber : This is serious. That weird gypsy at the convention was right. I think my mom's that weird animal that's been attacking all those women.

• Stacey Pubah : [as Jennifer stares in trance, after encountering Harry]  Werewolves have the power of hypnotizing people into believing that they're friends. He's the guy who did it to her.

  Jennifer Shaber : Nah, he's just a friend.

  Stacey Pubah : No, he's the one that has to die. Look, shoot him with a silver bullet and your mom is cured.

  Jennifer Shaber : Mom?

  [goes out of trance] 

  Jennifer Shaber : mom?

• Jennifer Shaber : [Leslie puts bandages on her toe, while her daughter Jennifer walks in]  Hi Mom.

  Leslie Shaber : Hi Jennifer.

  Jennifer Shaber : What happened to your toe?

  Leslie Shaber : I must have stubbed it

  Jennifer Shaber : Stubbed it?

  Leslie Shaber : Mmm.

  Jennifer Shaber : Looks like an animal bit it.

  [Leslie laughs] 

• Stacey Pubah : [looking through the beauty parlor window]  Holy shit! Your mom's a werewolf.

  Jennifer Shaber : [sarcastically]  Really?

• Stacey Pubah : I bet you didn't know that Lon Chaney Jr. was the only actors to play all the monsters: Frankenstein, Dracula, the Wolfman and the Mummy.

  [Giggles] 

  Stacey Pubah : Oh, guess how many times Bela Lugosi played Dracula?

  Jennifer Shaber : Who cares?