Arthur (1981)

John Gielgud: Hobson

Photos 

Quotes 

• Arthur : Hobson?

  Hobson : Yes.

  Arthur : Do you know what I'm going to do?

  Hobson : No, I don't.

  Arthur : I'm going to take a bath.

  Hobson : I'll alert the media.

  Arthur : [rises]  Do you want to run my bath for me?

  Hobson : That's what I live for.

  [Arthur exits] 

  Hobson : Perhaps you would like me to come in there and wash your dick for you, you little shit.

• Hobson : Thank you for a memorable afternoon, usually one must go to a bowling alley to meet a woman of your stature.

• Hobson : [wearing a cowboy hat Arthur gave him to cheer him up]  If I begin to die, please take this off my head. This is not the way I wish to be remembered.

• Arthur : What are you doing later tonight?

  Linda : Oh, I have plans for tonight. What should I wear?

  Hobson : Steal something casual.

• Hobson : Thrilling to meet you, Gloria.

  Gloria : Hi.

  Hobson : Yes... You obviously have a wonderful economy with words, Gloria. I look forward to your next syllable with great eagerness.

• Arthur : Oh, stay with me, Hobson. You know I hate to be alone.

  Hobson : Yes, bathing is a lonely business.

  Arthur : Except for fish.

  Hobson : I beg your pardon? Did you say "except for fish"?

  Arthur : Yes... fish all bathe together. Although they do tend to eat one another. I often think... fish must get awfully tired of seafood. What are you thoughts, Hobson?

  Hobson : Pardon me...

  [rises, removes Arthur's top hat and smacks him upside the head] 

• Hobson : Would you remove your helmet, please?

  Arthur : Why?

  Hobson : Please.

  [Arthur hands him his helmet] 

  Hobson : Thank you. Now your goggles.

  Arthur : Why?

  Hobson : Please.

  [Arthur hands him his goggles] 

  Hobson : Thank you.

  [slaps him across the face repeatedly] 

  Hobson : You spoiled little bastard! You're a man who has everything, haven't you, but that's not enough. You feel unloved, Arthur, welcome to the world. Everyone is unloved. Now stop feeling sorry for yourself. And incidentally, I love you.

• Arthur : Hobson, do you know the worst part, the WORST part of being me?

  Hobson : I should imagine your breath.

• Hobson : [to Ralph]  If you and your undershirt will walk two paces backwards, I could enter this dwelling.

• Arthur : [waiting at Arthur's father's office]  I hate it here!

  Hobson : Of course you hate it. People work here.

• Hobson : Poor drunks do not find love, Arthur. Poor drunks have very few teeth, they urinate outdoors, they freeze to death in summer. I can't bear to think of you that way.

• Executive : He gets all that money. Pays his family back by... by... by bein' a stinkin' drunk. It's enough ta make ya sick.

  Hobson : I really wouldn't know, sir. I'm just a servant.

  Executive : Yeah.

  Hobson : On the other hand, go screw yourself.

• Ralph : Here's your tea.

  Hobson : I despise tea. Now, would you go to the bathroom and bring me two aspirin? You'll find them on the top shelf to the left, behind the untouched shaving cream.

  [Ralph looks embarrassed and leaves the room. Hobson coughs] 

  Linda : That sounds bad. Have you seen a doctor?

  Hobson : Yes. And he has seen me.

  Linda : You know, I think Arthur has a very good friend. May I kiss you on the cheek?

  Hobson : Is it something you feel strongly about?

  Linda : Yes.

  [She kisses Hobson, who smiles, nods, and prepares to leave] 

  Linda : What about your aspirins?

  Hobson : The aspirins are for you, my dear.

• Hobson : I've taken the liberty of anticipating your condition. I have brought you orange juice, coffee, and aspirins. Or do you need to throw up?

• [in a department store, Arthur and Hobson see Linda putting a tie in her bag] 

  Arthur : Hobson, did you see that?

  Hobson : [wearily]  Yes.

  Arthur : She stole that tie! It's the perfect crime; girls don't wear ties! Although some do; it's not a perfect crime, but it's a good crime.

  Hobson : Yes; if she murdered the ties it would be the perfect crime. Why are you so happy about all this?

• Arthur : Do you want anything?

  Hobson : I want to be younger.

  Arthur : Sorry, it's your job to be older.

• [to Arthur, after Linda Marolla stole a necktie from a store] 

  Hobson : Yes, I see no reason for prolonging this conversation, unless you're planning to knock over a fruit stand later in the evening.

  Hobson : [to Linda]  Good luck in prison.

• Arthur : [while taking a bath]  God, isn't life wonderful, Hobson?

  Hobson : Yes, Arthur, it is. Do your armpits.

  Arthur : A hot bath is wonderful... Girls are WONDERFUL!

  Hobson : Yes, imagine how wonderful a girl who bathes would be. Get dressed.

• Arthur : I just told Linda I was getting engaged.

  Hobson : I don't know why; a little tart like that could save you a fortune in prostitutes.

• Hobson : Arthur, you're a good son.

• Hobson : [entering Linda's apartment]  How revolting!

• Hobson : Here, read this magazine. There are many pictures.