Husband and wife acting team Alan Lake and Diana Dors sink to the lowest point of their respective careers in this tedious British sex comedy. The long, drawn-out plot fails to hold the attention and Lake's performance, as sex-obsessed astrologer David Galaxy, is annoying and virtually unwatchable, (why any woman would fall for his hackneyed chat-up lines is anyone's guess). Despite a fairly interesting role as a wealthy businesswoman, Dors doesn't fair much better either. The movie's one saving grace is a brief turn fom 70's sex bomb Mary Millington, playing one of Galaxy's numerous sexual 'conquests'. Mary's performance is funny and mesmerizing but even she fails to save a pitiful film.
6 Reviews
"Even galaxies must fall!"
ShadeGrenade20 December 2010
Warning: Spoilers
Astrology has never been a favourite subject of mine. The titular hero of this lame British sex comedy is an astrologer, and a darned good one judging from the way he lives. Plush apartment, fast car, trendy clothes. The late Alan Lake is 'David Galaxy' whose interest in heavenly bodies does not only extend to those to be found in the sky. Women cannot keep their knickers on in the presence of this after shave reeking, curly-haired, medallion man. While he tramps around late '70's London in search of a good time, two policemen ( Glynn Edwards and John Moulder-Brown ) have him under surveillance, believing him to been involved in a Securicor van robbery five years previously in which the driver died. 'Galaxy' is one of the most irritating characters ever to appear on the big screen. As played by Lake, you find yourself wishing he would jump in one. He calls his penis "Fido", pinches other people's jokes, and has a habit of doing rubbish impressions of the likes of John Wayne, Mohammed Ali, Larry Grayson and Basil Rathbone. It is hard to believe any self-respecting woman would give him the time of day. She would be more likely to laugh at him. In possibly the nadir of '70's British cinema, Galaxy is making out with lovely Amanda ( Sally Faulkener ) when he farts loudly. She complains - rightly so - but he sneers: "Everyone farts! All except one - YOU!".
There is a subplot in which 70's sex-pot Mary Millington plays 'Millicent Cumming' ( ho ho ho ), a poor little rich girl who's never had an orgasm in her life despite having slept with thousands of men. Galaxy does the trick, unaware that his best mate Steve ( Anthony Booth ) and bartender Joe ( Kenny Lynch ) have bugged the room and are listening to every puff and pant.
As someone who enjoyed the 'Confessions' movies with Robin Askwith ( and, to a lesser extent, the 'Adventures' series ), I found this a real chore to sit through. The script gives no-one anything amusing to do or say and wastes everyone, including Ballard Berkeley of 'Fawlty Towers'. Even the sex is not at that exciting. Lake's wife Diana Dors appears as the owner of the apartment block where he lives, and Bernie Winters ( minus Schnorbitz ) is 'Mr.Pringle'. Mary took her own life only a few months after this went on release. Both Dors and Lake passed on five years later. As well as Millington, we have the equally lovely Rosemary England as 'Sandra'.
The clock was ticking for this kind of movie in 1979. It flopped and was swiftly retitled 'Star Sex' ( sounds like the name of a Channel Four game-show ). A curio then. Don't expect much and you just might...get even less! Incidentally, if Galaxy is such a good astrologer how come he failed to predict his own incarceration in jail at the movie's end?
There is a subplot in which 70's sex-pot Mary Millington plays 'Millicent Cumming' ( ho ho ho ), a poor little rich girl who's never had an orgasm in her life despite having slept with thousands of men. Galaxy does the trick, unaware that his best mate Steve ( Anthony Booth ) and bartender Joe ( Kenny Lynch ) have bugged the room and are listening to every puff and pant.
As someone who enjoyed the 'Confessions' movies with Robin Askwith ( and, to a lesser extent, the 'Adventures' series ), I found this a real chore to sit through. The script gives no-one anything amusing to do or say and wastes everyone, including Ballard Berkeley of 'Fawlty Towers'. Even the sex is not at that exciting. Lake's wife Diana Dors appears as the owner of the apartment block where he lives, and Bernie Winters ( minus Schnorbitz ) is 'Mr.Pringle'. Mary took her own life only a few months after this went on release. Both Dors and Lake passed on five years later. As well as Millington, we have the equally lovely Rosemary England as 'Sandra'.
The clock was ticking for this kind of movie in 1979. It flopped and was swiftly retitled 'Star Sex' ( sounds like the name of a Channel Four game-show ). A curio then. Don't expect much and you just might...get even less! Incidentally, if Galaxy is such a good astrologer how come he failed to predict his own incarceration in jail at the movie's end?
Not quite as bad as made out
malcolmgsw28 June 2018
This was made at a time when attendance at cinemas was plummeting and there was a duopoly of Rank and ABC.They were both desperate for British films to fulfil their quota requirements that they would show feeble sex comedies like this.There is the pleasure of spotting British character actors,such as Ballard Berkeley,taking the money and running.
God, rid the galaxy of this David
jaibo9 July 2008
Warning: Spoilers
David Galaxy is a selfish, narcissistic, sexist, racist and homophobic little astrologer who gets women for to have sex with him using the most hackneyed of chat-up lines and litters his conversation with p**s-poor attempts at humour. Quite why the filmmakers of this incompetent mess expect the audience to follow this fellow around for an hour and a half of nothing very much happening is the question. The only element of plot is that a couple of coppers are set on fitting him up for a 5 year old armed robbery - when they succeed in sending him down, one doesn't deplore police corruption as much as applaud them for ridding the streets and our screen of this odious personage.
Most of the script is a random collection of softcore sexual encounters (repulsive to the eye as they feature Galaxy) and petty contretemps - sometimes these two elements collide, as when Galaxy farts whilst screwing a psychologist girlfriend (you have to feel sorry for the splendid Sally Faulkner playing this part) which causes a bitter ruckus. There's a supremely distasteful leering sub-plot involving a society heiress who has had sex with thousands of men but has never had an orgasm (a role absurdly played by the common-as-muck former porn star Mary Millington); quite what the other men who schtupped her must have been like is unimaginable, because the disgusting Galaxy succeeds in getting her off - perhaps she has a kink for sleazeballs, but the script doesn't go in for that level of psychological nuance. Did I say script? That supremely flatters a screenplay chock-full of unbelievable incidents, poorly thought-out police procedural and dialogue which would shame a remedial school drama class improvisation.
As for the acting, nearly everyone isn't bothering. Alan Lake's turn as Galaxy is the epitome of charmless incompetent self-indulgence. And what a shame it is to see John Moulder-Brown, so good in Deep End and who worked with Visconti, reduced to appearing in the thankless role of a clichéd plod in this reeking pile of dirt.
Some of the British sexploitation films of the 70s manage to give us a peak into what Britain was like at the time; this film simply manages to show us what went on in the fetid imaginations of a bunch of talentless, middle-aged men.
Most of the script is a random collection of softcore sexual encounters (repulsive to the eye as they feature Galaxy) and petty contretemps - sometimes these two elements collide, as when Galaxy farts whilst screwing a psychologist girlfriend (you have to feel sorry for the splendid Sally Faulkner playing this part) which causes a bitter ruckus. There's a supremely distasteful leering sub-plot involving a society heiress who has had sex with thousands of men but has never had an orgasm (a role absurdly played by the common-as-muck former porn star Mary Millington); quite what the other men who schtupped her must have been like is unimaginable, because the disgusting Galaxy succeeds in getting her off - perhaps she has a kink for sleazeballs, but the script doesn't go in for that level of psychological nuance. Did I say script? That supremely flatters a screenplay chock-full of unbelievable incidents, poorly thought-out police procedural and dialogue which would shame a remedial school drama class improvisation.
As for the acting, nearly everyone isn't bothering. Alan Lake's turn as Galaxy is the epitome of charmless incompetent self-indulgence. And what a shame it is to see John Moulder-Brown, so good in Deep End and who worked with Visconti, reduced to appearing in the thankless role of a clichéd plod in this reeking pile of dirt.
Some of the British sexploitation films of the 70s manage to give us a peak into what Britain was like at the time; this film simply manages to show us what went on in the fetid imaginations of a bunch of talentless, middle-aged men.
Miscasting if ever there was
Leofwine_draca1 October 2018
Warning: Spoilers
CONFESSIONS FROM THE DAVID GALAXY AFFAIR is a quite dreadful addition to the kitchen sink sexploitation movie genre that Britain was well known for in the 1970s. It's particularly bad due to the central casting of the ultra-sleazy Alan Lake as some kind of super stud who has his way with pretty much every woman in the movie; Lake is a truly repulsive character here and you wonder just what the casting director was smoking. The film is generally unappealing and unerotic, with an odd sense of humour that doesn't translate well for the viewer; who thought the scene of Lake farting in bed was funny? The pseudo-crime storyline is particularly moronic and unending and character actors like Tony Booth and Diana Dors seem faintly desperate by appearing. The one thing this film has going for it is a good supply of attractive women, Mary Millington among them, and of course they do disrobe regularly, but it's hardly a proper movie and these actresses deserved better.
Sadly not a galaxy thats far far away..
morrison-dylan-fan13 March 2011
Warning: Spoilers
With having been very disappointed with the previous Millington/Sullivan film The Playbirds –which instead of being a fun "light Giallo" was instead a drama that moved at a snails pace.At first I was not that keen at all on watching the film.But due to a friend having kindly let me borrow the films,I felt that I should at least give this one a try. The plot:
Since having been the getaway driver for an extremely successful robbery,David Galaxy has done everything he can to make sure that he is THE man about town.Galaxy uses his slimy charms to get anything he wants,from getting any girl he wants in his bed,to using his rubbish impressions to make some jealous ex-boyfriends completely forget that they wanted to beat him up!.Unexpectedly one morning,David gets a knock at the door and discovers that there are two police men waiting outside,who say that a witness has come forward,who claims that they saw David murder someone..
View on the film: Whilst there are sadly not as many great faces from the sitcoms of the time as there was in The Playbirds,the script has thankfully improved a good amount,with the film moving at a surprisingly pleasant pace.I also feel that Odeon Entertainment should again be highly praised for there stunning remastering of this very low-budget (se)xplotation,which probably looks and sounds a lot better than it ever has.Looking at the performances,I feel that Alan Lake does very well at making Galazy into a completely egotistical slime ball,who desperately desirer's to be an early (Pacino) proto-Scarface,who wants anyone that he can get a grip on.
Final view on the film:
A surprisingly pretty watchable exploitation film,with a good,greasy lead performance from Lake.
Since having been the getaway driver for an extremely successful robbery,David Galaxy has done everything he can to make sure that he is THE man about town.Galaxy uses his slimy charms to get anything he wants,from getting any girl he wants in his bed,to using his rubbish impressions to make some jealous ex-boyfriends completely forget that they wanted to beat him up!.Unexpectedly one morning,David gets a knock at the door and discovers that there are two police men waiting outside,who say that a witness has come forward,who claims that they saw David murder someone..
View on the film: Whilst there are sadly not as many great faces from the sitcoms of the time as there was in The Playbirds,the script has thankfully improved a good amount,with the film moving at a surprisingly pleasant pace.I also feel that Odeon Entertainment should again be highly praised for there stunning remastering of this very low-budget (se)xplotation,which probably looks and sounds a lot better than it ever has.Looking at the performances,I feel that Alan Lake does very well at making Galazy into a completely egotistical slime ball,who desperately desirer's to be an early (Pacino) proto-Scarface,who wants anyone that he can get a grip on.
Final view on the film:
A surprisingly pretty watchable exploitation film,with a good,greasy lead performance from Lake.
See also
Awards | FAQ | User Ratings | External Reviews | Metacritic Reviews
