Super Soul:
And there goes the Challenger, being chased by the blue, blue meanies on wheels. The vicious traffic squad cars are after our lone driver, the last American hero, the electric centaur, the, the demi-god, the super driver of the golden west! Two nasty Nazi cars are close behind the beautiful lone driver. The police numbers are gettin' closer, closer, closer to our soul hero, in his soul mobile, yeah baby! They about to strike. They gonna get him. Smash him. Rape... the last beautiful free soul on this planet.
Sandy:
Kowalski, and the keys for a sawed-off weekend. Well you're both welcome.
Kowalski:
What do you do with those things?
Prospector:
Trade 'em. Trade 'em for coffee, sugar, chewing tobacco, salt, flour, and beans, lots of beans, son.
Super Soul:
Hey Kowalski, you out there?
Charlie:
[
after listening to Super Soul's broadcast] Did you hear that?
Collins:
Yeah.
Charlie:
Where the hell he get so much information?
Collins:
Same place as you do, Charley.
Charlie:
You mean from our own frequency?
Collins:
That's right.
Charlie:
How long's he been at it?
Collins:
Year 'n a half, maybe two.
Charlie:
Hell, that's against the law!
Collins:
So's carryin' a transistor on duty.
Charlie:
Hey, come on now, that's different.
Collins:
But he never says anything to incriminate himself. Brains 'n lawyers, Charley. As far as the law's concerned, he's clean as Kleenex.
Charlie:
What do you think he's done?
Collins:
Don't know.
Charlie:
Well, what do you think?
Collins:
I think he's gonna hijack that car to Cuba, hahahaha.
Charlie:
Don't be ridiculous!
Collins:
Hell, Charley, I don' know! Maybe killed somebody! Maybe stole that big dude o' his! Maybe both.
Colorado State HP Officer:
Nevada, this is Colorado State Highway Patrol. This is about a special query raised by the Utah Highway Patrol. - Affirmative, that's correct, but later they asked that the information be forwarded to you guys, so get ready for some details. Put on your tape recorders and all that sort of jazz, huh? Apparantly this speed maniac you've been chasing all over your territory is a former professional road racer named Kowalski, K-O-W-A-L-S-K-I, repeat Kowalski. First name unkown, other particulars also unknown. All we do know is that he's employed as a car delivery driver by an agency in Denver. He's presently driving a Dodge Challenger, Colorado licence plate OA-5599. This is not a stolen car; he's driving it to San Francisco for delivery due Monday.
Nevada State HP Officer:
It's only Saturday, what's his hurry?
Colorado State HP Officer:
That's what we wanted to know ourselves, so your guess is as good as ours. 10-4.
Nude Motorcycle Rider:
Is there something I can do for you?
Kowalski:
Well, like what?
Nude Motorcycle Rider:
Like anything you want.
Kowalski:
How about a smoke?
Nude Motorcycle Rider:
Sure, I'll roll you one.
Kowalski:
No, no, no, no. A straight one.
Super Soul:
This radio station was named Kowalski, in honour of the last American hero to whom speed means freedom of the soul. The question is not when's he gonna stop, but who is gonna stop him.
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