All Neat in Black Stockings (1969) User Reviews

recommended for Susan George fans only!

[RavenGlamDVDCollector · 5/10 · 2 August 2015]

(my review title with apologies to Burkbob,one of the two other reviewers)

Four great things about this movie: (1) the title (2) the DVD box cover, ooh black-and-tan, yes! (3) the scene as in (2) above in the movie itself (4) I will get to the fourth in the next paragraph

I would not have bought this DVD were it not for Susan George being in it. I collect her movies and I've got almost all the noteworthy ones, with OUT OF SEASON being the last one outstanding. After viewing this one I have to concur with the other reviewer who warned that thus movie is only of value to Susan George fans. Really, it leaves one quite a lot depressed at the end, and then, while in a gloomy mood, you think bad about the film. Which has a considerable lot of shortcomings. I'm in no frame of mind to list them now - my two colleagues here on IMDb did a good job here in their reviews and I'll let that suffice. But as for her with the golden hair and the big soulful eyes, once again, you did not disappoint, my dear. Ratty movie (literally) but yet another winning performance by the prettiest dolly bird in Swinging London during the Late Sixties. Let me just say that Susan George has got to be the cuddliest girl ever. Thank you and goodnight and feel free to vote for me as being Unhelpful.

Great title, but ultimately a bit of a disappointment...

[canndyman · 4/10 · 21 July 2016]

This film is certainly a bit of an oddity - & very much of its time (1969). The post-promiscuous society plot, concerning the amorous adventures of window cleaner Ginger, seems at first like a forerunner to the later 'Confessions' films - but somehow never really cuts it or even aspires to even that level of low-brow adventurism. The first half is muddled, silly & incredibly sexist, & leaves the viewer not particularly liking Ginger & his uncaring attitude towards women; the second half becomes more like a kitchen-sink drama, but lacks the depth & believability of something like 'Alfie'.

Susan George (fresh from her appearance as Joyce in 'Up the Junction') is wonderful as eye candy, & saves the film, but she did seem to have a habit at this time of sometimes appearing in movies that were often fairly thin & unsatisfying, & perhaps beneath her talents.

The plot is populated with eccentric characters & situations, & certainly has a loose, almost made-up-as-it-goes-along swinging-sixties feel. In its favour, there are plenty of colourful locations around London, & it gives a good snapshot of how the capital looked at the time, & the fashions - even if the plot is rather far-fetched. Scenes in humdrum cafes & bars are well staged & add some grittiness.

All in all though, not a classic sadly (although I hear it was fairly-well received by contemporary audiences at the time). Great for fans of Susan George & sixties London, but don't expect a full-on sex comedy (it has a 12 certificate) or anything even much in the way of black stockings! The film's biggest downfall for me is the chauvinistic attitudes on display, which made me feel rather uncomfortable - but thankfully nowadays are an unfortunate anachronism.

A randy Ginger and his best bud Dwyer live for today and to hell with what tomorrow may bring

[Ed-Shullivan · 6/10 · 19 September 2020]

Two care free buddies who share their apartment, rent, bar tabs and even their women live for today and say "to hell with whatever happens tomorrow". This film will certainly appeal to any young virile men (and women of today) who just want to live a care free life of sex and booze (drugs did not appear to appeal to these two randy Andy's) .

I would classify this film unlike many other reviewers as an "adventure" film as we get to follow actor Victor Henry as the raven red haired lad named "Ginger" who works during the day with his trusted ladder and pail washing windows and chasing skirts every night at the local pubs in swinging London of the 1960's. Ginger and his best friend Dwyer (Jack Shepherd) enjoy playing tricks on their nightly conquests by deliberately switching bedmates in the middle of the night unbeknownst to their conquests so they can both have a two for the price of one night in different bedrooms.

This innocent enough lovemaking trick backfires on the randy Ginger when he meets what he thinks is his "IT" girl named Jill (Susan George). At a wild house party Ginger leaves his love of his life virgin alone for just a short time in a bedroom while he tries to break up the wild party going on downstairs. Little does he know that his best buddy Dwyer is about to do what the two best friends have always done and switch bedrooms in the middle of the night to sneak in another quick romp in bed with their unsuspecting female conquest(s). As a result the virgin Jill becomes pregnant and then this film becomes more dramatic and a lot less funny.

What will Jill and Ginger do now? Will Jill become an unwed mother? Will Dwyer step up and take responsibility for dipping his dirty stick in the virgin hole of Jill and becoming a father? Or will Jill and Ginger who appeared to be in love take the leap to marriage? But no, the story does not end here. The randy Ginger knocks on Jill's mother's door in another drunken stupor and before you can say sausage, bacon eggs and toast, the drunken Ginger has successfully wooed his girlfriend's mother and miraculously also cured Jill's mothers severely injured back ailments.

When Jill comes back from the hospital she witnesses her now sprightly mom with a new happy kick in her step and Ginger is all smiles as well. Don't take the film too seriously. It's an adventure film with some twists and turns and isn't that what happens in real life anyways?

Susan George who plays Jill the innocent virgin involved in her first real romance with Ginger (Victor Henry) quickly becomes a mother with child. As for the two best friends, Ginger and Dwyer wellll ..... boys will be boys.

I give the film a 6 out of 10 IMDB rating.

a mixed bag but there are delights

[christopher-underwood · 30 May 2014]

Even as I write this i'm not really sure how much I did or didn't enjoy this. Fine title but misleading, the titular garments appear but to no significant extent. There are pluses and minuses in this. It moved along nicely and was generally well directed, particularly the dance, pub and party scenes, which seem to trip up the best of directors. The script is a mess and I suppose here lies the problem. Is this a 'Confessions' type romp? Certainly not. A serious and well argued critique of the times. No, again and I guess it is the fact that it probably falls between these two that is the biggest problem. Getting to have sex is treated as a joke and then marriage and the question of abortion are treated seriously. Its a mixed bag but there are delights, many advertising street hoardings and London back streets, infuriatingly unidentified plus the aforementioned indoor gatherings. Victor Henry strikes me as an unconvincing character, either joshing wildly or moralising terribly. No the only star here and she shines pretty brightly in one of her earlier roles, is Susan George.

Not much to write home about

[Burkbob · 3/10 · 9 September 2006]

All Neat in Black Stockings is a film that can't quite make up its mind whether it wants to be a comedy or a drama. We have Ginger (Victor Henry) and Dwyer (Jack Shepherd), two blokes on the make who share everything including their current girlfriends. Ginger has a sister (Anne Cropper) who is pregnant and a boyfriend named Issur (Harry Towb), who is artistic but irresponsible. And then there is Old Gunge (played by the noted character actor Terence de Marney). And let's not forget the irresistible Susan George as Jill. Finally, we have London in the Swinging Sixties. It would appear that we have all the elements here for an interesting film except, of course, for one thing - a well-written script. Ginger works as a window-washer. He's also taking care of eccentric Old Gunge's house while Old Gunge is being treated at the hospital. While on a date, he espies the lovely Jill and begins to hatch plans for the two of them to get together. He trades his van in for a sporty set of wheels and eventually makes his move on Jill. Ginger would like to consummate his relationship with the virginal Jill except that her hostile mother (Clare Kelly) always seems to be in the way. Eventually, Ginger and Jill wind up at Old Gunge's house where Sis's boyfriend Issur is throwing one of those typically wild Sixties parties. Ginger hands Jill off to his chum Dwyer while he throws the partiers out at the point of a halberd. When Ginger goes looking for his special girl, he discovers her upstairs in a bedroom having lost her virginity to the always ready Dwyer. Naturally, our sweet Jill discovers shortly afterward that she is pregnant and Ginger "does the right thing" (even though he is not responsible) and marries her. With Jill out of the house expecting her child, Ginger comes home late one night after a pronounced drinking bout and ends up in bed with Jill's mom, who quickly discovers a ready cure for her chronic backache. So, at this point, in our story Ginger is happy and so is Jill's mom while Jill herself is not so sure. When we last see Ginger, he is in a lunchroom chatting up another potential conquest. All Neat in Black Stockings might have been a witty black comedy focusing on relationships in the crazy Sixties. Or, it might have been an interesting drama looking at the difficulties of commitment. Unfortunately, it just doesn't go anywhere. Recommended for Susan George fans only.

Poor man's Alfie

[malcolmgsw · 3/10 · 6 June 2016]

This is a really poor attempt to cash in on the success of Alfie.The problem is that none of the elements present in Alfie are present here.Victor Henry is no Michael Caine,nor is he even up to Robin Askwith.You just look at him and wonder how on earth would a character like this attract women.They all seem to fall weak at the knees at his caveman approach to them.He obviously gets his just desserts in the end when he has to marry Susan George,having got her pregnant only to discover that she is going to tern into a mirror image of her battleaxe mother.Having said that one major flaw is that the attraction between George and Henry seems totally unlikely.

Amazed

[leavymusic-2 · 2/10 · 2 June 2021]

It ever got made !

Not funny, no story, only good thing is Susan George, & she doesn't do much in it either.

Better cast and better script and it might of scraped by.

Don't waste you're time !

Neat and Tidy.

[morrison-dylan-fan · 7/10 · 11 August 2015]

Taking a look at a DVDs sellers page,I spotted a Drama starring Susan George which I had never heard of before,which led to me deciding that it was time to find out how neat the black stockings were.

The plot:

Charming every girl they meet,Ginger and his friend Dwyer live their single lives to the fullest,with them swapping each others girlfriends.Along with exchanging dates,Ginger takes advantage of friend Old Gunge asking Ginger to take care of his place whilst he is in hospital,by turning Gunge's place into his own home.

Going out on a date,Ginger is stopped in his tracks by Jill,whose ravishing appearance causes Ginger to clean himself up for the first time in his life.After spending years pushing the fairer sex to the side,Ginger finds himself falling in love for the first time.

View on the film:

Filmed on location in London miles away from any landmarks,director Christopher Morahan and cinematographer Larry Pizer soak up the sites,sounds and smell (puts peg on nose!) of the dying swinging sixties,with Ginger's house being covered in mouldy browns which display the rot that has set in.Along with Ginger's rusting house,Morahan and Pizer cleverly use swift tracking shots to open up the on-location filming,with Morahan scanning every ageing billboard sign across the screen.

Kicking off the film with Ginger doing some window cleaning in order to catch a cheeky glimpse of naked girls,writers Jane Gaskell & Hugh Whitemore's adaptation of Gaskell's novel tantalisingly cross saucy Sex Comedy with gritty Kitchen Sink Drama.Blending the genres,the writers brilliantly show Ginger's playful behaviour around girls to carry a strong feeling of serious issues laying underneath,which reveal themselves when Ginger finds that he wants to move away from the life him and Dwyer have been living.

Putting his arm round every girl he spots, Victor Henry gives a great performance as Ginger,with Henry expertly expressing Ginger's difficulty in allowing his sincere side to come out of his rough and ready manner.Rolling in the streets with Henry, Jack Shepherd gives a very good performance as Dwyer,who Shepered fills with unease over Ginger wanting to move away from their good times life style,as Susan George gives Jill wonderful notes of quiet elegance,as Jill shows herself to be all neat in black stockings.

Depressingly real people

[crvierra · 7/10 · 8 March 2023]

Though it is difficult at times to identify with the motivations that impel characters in this movie to behave the way they do, at least it doesn't try to pretend that they can skate through life without any consequences for their choices. Still, the lessons that will be plain to viewers seem to be ignored by these characters who seem bent on following up bad decisions with worse ones. Even the few positive actions (i.e., marrying a raped girl to remove the stigma of illegitimacy and chosing not to abort the baby) are quickly buried in the mire of a loveless marriage, a philandering husband, and incest. Makes the upbeat music as credits roll seem poorly chosen for a movie that has the overall effect of causing disgust in the viewer.