A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum (1966)

Patricia Jessel: Domina

Photos 

Quotes 

• Hysterium : Rather than let you down, I would die.

  Domina : That is what I had in mind.

• Domina : Forgive me for ever having mistrusted you, my darling. But you HAVE been a little distant these past 29 years.

• Domina's Mother : Gone to see a nose-grinder, indeed. He's cavorting with those courtesans.

  Domina : But Mother, what can I do?

  Domina's Mother : Return to Rome immediately, before he can do what no doubt he's already done. Go!

  [whips Domina] 

• Domina : A common flesh-peddler in the house next to ours, disgusting!

  Senex : Disgraceful, all that revolting flesh. Just next door...

• Domina : That breeder woman, has she been thrown a mate yet?

  Hysterium : Alas, she refuses just any slave. She demands to choose.

  Senex : Choose? She'll breed and like it, like everyone. Well, almost everyone.

• Domina : Come, Senex. And carry my bust with pride!

• Pseudolus : Madam, the hospitality of your house is being enjoyed by Miles Gloriosus.

  Domina : THE Gloriosus?

  Pseudolus : The THE himself!

• Roman Sentry : Citizens, we caught your runaway slave. Now he dare challenge our right to execute him.

  Pseudolus : Because I'm a family slave. Whats the good of belonging to a family if you're executed by strangers?

  Domina : He is correct. We shall torture him.

  Pseudolus : See how they look after their own?

• Domina : We go to buy a breeder slave. Attend to him, Hysterium, my slave of slaves.

• Domina : You were doing what you always do - seeking money to buy your freedom.

  Pseudolus : Freedom? Oh, madam, who would want to be free of you?

  Senex : Who indeed?

• [last lines] 

  Pseudolus : [sung]  Lovers divided, get coincided - something for everyone...

  Hero , Philia : A comedy tonight!

  Pseudolus : Father and mother, get one another.

  Domina : Something for everyone...

  Senex : [whispers]  A tragedy tonight.

  Miles Gloriosus : I get the twins, they get the best!

  Erronius : I get a family...

  Hysterium : I get a rest.

  Soldiers : We get a few girls...

  Lycus : I'll get some new girls.

  Pseudolus : I get the thing I want to be...

  Hero : [spoken]  Free.

  Pseudolus : Free!

  Pseudolus , Hero , Philia , Domina , Senex , Miles Gloriosus , Erronius , Hysterium , Soldiers , Lycus : Free, free, free, free - Nothing for kings, nothing for crowns! Something for lovers, liars and clowns - What is the moral? Must be a moral. Here is the moral wrong or right - Morals tomorrow, comedy, comedy, comedy, comedy, comedy - tonight!