Meet Me in St. Louis (1944)

Joan Carroll: Agnes Smith

Photos 

Quotes 

• Agnes Smith : Katie? Katie, where's my cat? Where is she?

  Katie (Maid) : I don't know. A little while ago, she got in my way and I kicked her down the cellar steps. I could hear her spine hitting on every step.

  Agnes Smith : Oh, if you killed her, I'll kill you! I'll stab you to death in your sleep, then I'll tie your body to two wild horses until you're pulled apart.

  Katie (Maid) : Oh, won't that be terrible, now? There's your cat.

• Agnes Smith : I can't get hungry till it gets dark.

  Katie (Maid) : Dinner's at five-thirty. You can eat blind-folded!

  Mrs. Anna Smith : We have to be out of the dining room by six-thirty. Warren Sheffield is telephoning Rose, long distance from New York. And Rose, if I were you, I wouldn't committ myself one way or another. After all...

  Rose Smith : Mama, for goodness sakes!

  Mrs. Anna Smith : After all, we know very little about him. Why, we haven't even met his folks.

  Rose Smith : It seems to me. It seems to me that one little phone call is causing an awful lot of excitement in this family!

  Mrs. Anna Smith : Besides, you're entirely too young and I don't think your father will allow it.

  Katie (Maid) : Mrs. Smith, if I have to keep lying to your daughters, I'll have to had more money.

  Mrs. Anna Smith : Now remember, you two: not a word of this to your papa. You know how he plagues the girls about their beaus.

  Agnes Smith : Everybody knows but Papa?

  Grandpa : Your papa's not supposed to know. It's enough we're letting him work hard every day to support the whole flock of us. He can't have everything.

• Agnes Smith : Rose, what did you get me for Christmas?

  Rose Smith : You'll find out tomorrow.

  Agnes Smith : I hope it's a hunting knife!

• Rose Smith : Agnes Smith, you're nothing less than a murderer. You could have killed dozens of people!

  Agnes Smith : Oh, Rose, you're so stuck up.

• Katie (Maid) : Mrs. Smith, who are these boys?

  Agnes Smith : It's me, Katie, it's Agnes!

  Katie (Maid) : Saints preserve us, it is! You had me fooled!

  'Tootie' Smith : Mama, we fooled her!

  Mrs. Anna Smith : Well, if you can fool our Katie, you can fool anyone.

  Katie (Maid) : Agnes, I thought you were a drunken ghost.

  Agnes Smith : But I am. Tootie's a horrible ghost, and I'm a terrible drunken ghost.

  'Tootie' Smith : She was murdered in a den of thieves, and I died of a broken heart. I've never even been buried because everyone's scared to come near me.

• Agnes Smith : Rose, it's six-thirty and Warren hasn't called yet.

  'Tootie' Smith : Maybe he found another girl.

  Mrs. Anna Smith : Quiet, you two.

  Rose Smith : Mama, I assure you that I'm not the slightest bit sensitive about Warren Sheffield.

  Grandpa : The queen has spoken.

  Lon Smith Jr. : I suppose Warren's too young, too. Every fellow I introduce her to is too young.

  Mrs. Anna Smith : Now, listen. Your papa will be down in a minute, and if we all eat quickly, we may still get out of here before the call comes through.

  Esther Smith : Warren is twenty-one and I think that's a perfect age.

  Rose Smith : He's practically a child.

  Mrs. Anna Smith : Your father was twenty when we were married.

  Grandpa : We gave him the bachelor dinner the night before. He almost missed the wedding!

• Grandpa : [moaning]  Ohhhhhhh.

  Katie (Maid) : What was that?

  Grandpa : Here are your sacks of flour.

  [Hand them to Tootie and Agnes] 

  Grandpa : You couldn't get me out on a night like this for a million dollars!

  Agnes Smith : Did anyone here a noise just now?

  Grandpa : Did it sound like this?

  [moans again] 

  Grandpa : Ohhhhhh?

  Agnes Smith : Uh-huh.

  Grandpa : [Shakes his head]  I didn't hear it.

  Grandpa : If you wet the flour before you throw it, it makes it harder for the victim to remove it.

• 'Tootie' Smith : Hello, Papa, I buried Maude Rockefeller today, and you missed all the fun.

  Mr. Alonzo Smith : Oh, I wouldn't say that. I've had a pretty full day. Tootie, remind me to spank you right after dinner.

  'Tootie' Smith : Yes, Papa.

  Mr. Alonzo Smith : Lord, we thank thee for the bountiful blessing we are about to receive. Amen.

  'Tootie' Smith : Agnes, if I forget to remind Papa, you remind me.

  Agnes Smith : All right.

• Agnes Smith : [Giggles]  Roses are red, John's name is Truett, Esther's in love, We always knew it!

  Grandpa : Truett... Knew it... That's good. But I can't think of anything that rhymes with "Colonel" if it isn't "Infernal."

• 'Tootie' Smith : We'll fix him fine. It'll serve him right for poisoning cats... He buys meat and then he buys poison and then he puts them all together.

  Agnes Smith : And then he burns the cats at midnight in his furnace. You could smell the smoke...

  'Tootie' Smith : ...and Mr. Braukoff was beating his wife with a red hot poker... and Mr. Braukoff has empty whiskey bottles in his cellar.