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- A fouled radio call for help on a crossword puzzle leads to a senior officer coming to the 4077th to help with a supposed serious medical problem.
- Every day for the past six weeks, at 5:00 o'clock p.m. on the nose, a North Korean "washout from Kamikaze school" has let loose a bomb in the general direction of the hospital's sub-ammo dump. Very affectionately known as "Five O'Clock Charlie," the only thing he hits on the nose is the time. Every day, Radar opens book on the day's exploits and takes bets on how close (in yards) Charlie will come to the sub-ammo dump. It is an occasion for cocktails and frivolity at 4077, not unlike the Kentucky Derby... until Frank demands Henry get him a "nug" from Brigadier Gen. Clayton. Capt. Phil Cardozo, the singing dentist, gives the drunken duo a new slant on things. If there is anything that will beat Frank and his nug, it is 4 dozen sheets, 18 gallons of mercurochrome and a little thing called psychology.
- The staff of the local Los Angeles Country Animal Control department office assist Fire Station 51 and Rampart Hospital on some animal related emergencies.
- Back from Russia but under the thumb of Naz's new restrictive rules, Brian helps investigate the murder of a billionaire who's new kidney was forcibly removed.
- Hawkeye records a letter to his Dad, detailing the exploits of a mad Turkish soldier, the loss of a Luxembourg Lieutenant's corpse, and a lieutenant's strong-arm tactics to obtain medical care for a comrade.
- After Malory is wiped out in a Ponzi scheme, she hatches a scheme of her own: selling ISIS to rival spy agency ODIN. Archer and the rest of the ISIS employees must use every trick in the book to try to stop the sale.
- In an act of protest, Hawkeye goes to Rosie's Bar and decrees that he will not leave. One by one he is joined by fellow surgeons and staff, including an annoyed Colonel Potter.
- Ehrlich considers proposing to Roberta. A risky transfer of a very sick patient from a private hospital draws the ire of Cavanero. A computer nerd who is a patient at the hospital develops a program to diagnose patients and is able to hack into the medical files. Morrison and Ridley treat a patient with severe mood swings.
- Bob and the family face the great outdoors.
- A helicopter crash introduces the 4077 to Colonel Sam Flagg, the well-built (says Hotlips) paranoid with a broken arm who refuses all painkillers. Colonel Flagg (who can also be identified as Major Brooks, Lt. Carter, Ensign Troy and Capt. Louise Klein) is CIA. Meanwhile, Trapper's friend, Vinny Pratt, also drops in; Vinny is Intelligence (G-2) and he wants to find out what Flagg is doing. Flagg is BIG, so his operation must be crucial. Because of Fr. Mulcahy, Vinny cannot be Capt. Perkins the priest, so he becomes Capt. Stone, the engineer. Vinny Pratt introduces himself to Henry as Major Strauss G-2 and tells Henry to call him Pratt. Flagg tells Hawkeye Flagg is Carter and Stone is really Martinez; so, if Martinez is there, the operation must be really BIG. Flagg is in the CID; he tells people he is CIA because it throws off people who think he is CIC. Then, Flagg re-breaks his own arm so he can continue treating...and spying. The surgeons have had more "intelligence" for one lifetime, Radar cables Tijuana for Flagg: "Mary had a little lamb. Stop. My dog has fleas. Stop. Mairzy doats and dozey doats, and I'll be home for Christmas. Signed: Your loving son, Queen Victoria." Pratt says HE is Mary. The guys bring the spy nonsense to a head by "doctoring" personnel files. Is Frank Burns a Communist, like Flagg believes? Or is he a Fascist, as Pratt suspects? It may be off to the Lubyanka, or some other gulag, for old Ferret Face.
- An African-American officer investigates a murder in a racially charged situation in World War II.
- Something is fishy about the clubbing deaths of two local residents.
- Manson recovers from his beating; Hodiak helps Shafe figure out who is tormenting his family.
- Henry finds out he's been discharged from the army and everyone at the 4077th prepares to say goodbye to him as he heads home.
- Archer and Lana travel to Wales for a romantic getaway of aiding separatists.
- Tensions rise after Blake sees Andy hitting on Katie. Beth goes to an unlikely source for help. Coop is crushed when Donna gives out multiple gifts.
- After literally being fed up with mess hall food, Hawkeye goes on a desperate quest to order barbecue spare ribs from his favorite restaurant, Adam's Ribs, at Dearborn Station in Chicago.
- Bob and Linda head out on the town for a date - but to Linda's dismay, Bob's idea of romance proves "trivial." Meanwhile, a wild chinchilla chase ensues after the school pet that Louis was charged with watching escapes out the front door.
- Hawkeye, Margaret, and Klinger travel to an aid station at the front, where they end up working closely together under heavy fire and unsanitary medical conditions.
- While B.J. and Hawkeye snipe at each other, Klinger romances a nurse and Winchester romances a Korean working girl.
- A bomber on board an airplane, an airport almost closed by snow, and various personal problems of the people involved.
- The girls are happy to head out on their first plane trip ever, but their smiles are turned upside down when their pilot passes out. Leaving it up to one of them to take over the controls.
- When Henry goes to Tokyo for a conference, Frank outlaws alcoholic beverages, dismantles the still, and enlists Father Mulcahy to present a sermon on the evils of drink. But Frank discovers that drying out the 4077th isn't so easy.
- Gene, Louise, and Tina discover a seaweed-covered object at the beach that turns out to be a large hunk of Ambergris - an extremely valuable, but illegal, by-product of whale poop that is used in high-end perfumes. But Louise tries to cheat Gene and Tina out of the profit she hopes to make by selling the treasure on the black market. Meanwhile, Bob and Linda deal with their psychologically unstable landlord who is building them a new bathroom.
- Winchester encourages Hawkeye, B.J. and Margaret to raise the stakes in their practical joke battle, and Father Mulcahy is desperate to receive a promotion.
- In order to entice an old flame who is only attracted to married men, Mr. Fischoeder bribes Bob into letting him pass off Linda and the kids as his own family, but the situation ruins all of Bob's Thanksgiving traditions.
- Days after the incident, Anouk finds unexpected responses from those around her.
- A retired professor rents his attic apartment to pregnant Peggy and her GI-Bill-student husband. The professor ponders if his life is no longer useful while the young couple faces the challenges shared with many WW II veterans' families.
- A gritty 1960s cop drama about LAPD detective Sam Hodiak and his trainee, who must deal with gangs, brutal crimes, changing times, family crises and unhinged manipulative small-time crook Charles Manson, who's slowly building his cult.
- Pam gets targeted for death by the Yakuza while the group continues to dig their way out of financial trouble.
- Archer, Pam and Lana travel to Miami to visit some old friends. It's a fondue party!
- While Lana is trying to give birth to her baby, it turns out that the whole "cocaine-case" was a secret agreement between Malory and the CIA.
- Archer and Pam try to get Kenny Loggins to play at Lana's baby shower and wind up in a zone of danger.
- Cyril becomes the new president of San Marcos, Cherlene becomes the first lady of country music, and Archer becomes a resistance fighter.
- Archer has to stage an intervention for Pam that gets derailed by an unwanted guest.
- Archer avoids crash landing in a dangerous swamp only to come face-to-face with a shady arms dealer (Christian Slater).
- Archer and the rest of the ISIS gang are the guests of Gustavo Calderon and his wife Juliana. Calderon is a big fan of Cherlene but Juliana is a bigger fan of Archer.
- Archer tries to keep his fling with the dictator's wife a secret while Krieger bonds with his clone-brothers.
- Archer travels to Columbia on a secret mission that becomes not so secret after he gets drunk.
- Malory buys a bus and takes everyone on a road trip. Put that hammer down and give it hell.
- Archer, Ray, and Cyril raft down a crocodile-filled river while Lana and Pam plan a spa day for Malory.
- After ISIS headquarters is raided by FBI Agents, Archer and Lana work to break out the crew while Mallory works on a deal to get them all free.
- A visiting Congressional aide accuses Margaret of being a Communist sympathizer and it could ruin her career. This dovetails with Klinger entering the Stars & Stripes photo contest.
- Linda's eccentric sister Gayle comes to town intending to use the restaurant as a gallery for her paintings during this year's "Art Crawl." Bob is left totally oblivious the comically explicit nature of Gayle's artwork until it's too late.
- The team delivers a baby, handles casualties and operates on Frank Burns' hernia during a power outage while Radar tries to divert friendly mortar fire falling too close to the camp.
- Astrophysicist Henry Neumann (David Hyde-Pierce) rents a cabin next door to the camp. BTO is flowing on WCFW. Claude Dumet (John Slattery) recasts the big theatrical show and holds auditions. The Falcon cleans up a convenience store. Andy catches Katie preparing for auditions and catches the acting bug. Kevin tries to save Amy from embarrassment. The hypnotist, "Jackie Brazen" visits and gets uncanny. Drew tries to call "dibs" on Amy. Ben does not realize he is creative; and this makes McKinley very surprised. At Camp Tiger Claw, Graham shows unusual depth and quality by choosing the best. Courtney hits on Flaky Blake; lip gloss used to be SO MUCH FUN in the 70s-80s. Warner calls Courtney a minx and Blake calls Warner a socialist. At the library, Gail finds out from Jeff Jeff that Jonas is not exactly who he says he is. As he ends his act, Jackie Brazen mangles a perfectly brilliant Einstein quote; so, perhaps he is not exactly who HE says he is, either!
- B.J. helps out a local Korean family. Meanwhile, a general has a series of mishaps in camp.
- The team learns of a baby selling ring when one of the children's mother comes to Miami looking for her child. The trail leads them to a sleazy lawyer. When the lawyer manages to tie up any loose ends, they decide to use the mother to trap him.
- The 4077th is forced to use extreme measures to save a group of soldiers suffering from hypothermia, while Klinger suffers temporary deafness after a mine explosion on his watch.
- Crockett flashes to his role during the Saigon evacuation as he and a war correspondent uncover heroin smuggled in body bags. Ten years later in Miami the H resurfaces and so does the reporter looking for the CIA connection.