- [to an assistant on being introduced to Madame Chiang, the wife of Chinese president Kai-Shek Chiang] That reminds me, I need to pick up my laundry.
- [to Albert Einstein] I have a theory of relativity, too. I never hire them.
- If it's anything I can't stand it's yes-men. When I say no, I want you to say no, too.
- [on criticism of the dubbing of My Fair Lady (1964)] I don't know what all the fuss is about. We've been doing it for years. We even dubbed Rin Tin Tin.
- [about actor Paul Muni, who had a tendency to wear such heavy makeup that Warner feared the public couldn't recognize him from movie to movie] Why are we paying him so much money when we can't find him?
- [on Errol Flynn] You know Flynn, he's either got to be fighting or fucking.
- I don't want it good. I want it Tuesday.
- [on the suggestion that Warners should film the novel "Dark Victory"] Who wants to see some dame go blind and die?
- [told that Ronald Reagan was running for governor of California] No, Bob Cummings for governor, Ronald Reagan as his best friend.
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